Anita is right, Lisa - give yourself a break! There comes a time when you just have to have some good old compassion for yourself and it's ok. When you tell your friends (or one that will tell others) have a list ready in case they ask "is there anything I can do?" And you could start with "I need a hug" or whatever else comes to mind and then some of the more practical (or even fun) stuff like something you need from the drugstore, or grocery store or laundry done, funny movie, etc. You have no idea how much it really helped me to have those errands and chores to do for my son when he was recovering. When your friends don't know what to say, they will feel better just knowing they are doing something to help you. So, start making your list and keep us updated.