Thanks guys, I'm trying to get rid of the shitty downer attitude. I haven't told any of my friends yet because the last they all heard was "Merry Christmas I am in remission". I am sick and tired of having to break more bad news and am sure that people are getting really sick of my drama, so I am going to keep this to myself until after the holidays are over. I have some good friends but I can see a few of them pulling away from me out of fear that I'm going to die. People don't know how to handle this stuff, and frankly I dont either. I'm just glad you guys are here, thanks so much for your support, I hope i can do the same.