I have had my jaw replaced with flap taken from my rt.lower leg. Flap failed and was replaced with flap from left thigh. I also had a portion of my tongue removed and the floor of the mouth rebuilt. Everybody is so different that it's hard to give you definite answers to some of the questions but some of the info you are getting does seem to be very confusing. It certainly appears you need a lot more clarification from the doctors and a 2nd opinion is also a good idea.
Best of luck.
Pat