Daisy,
I can relate to your husbands fears about needles. I did discover that most of the fear was mental after going through chemo, lots of bloodtests, etc. That didn't stop me from getting a presciption for Zanax for anxiety however. I took them all through treatment. There is also no reason why they can't give him something to take for pain before he leaves the house. Before I would leave the house for bloodwork I would pop a Vicodin (at least in the beginning) I soon found that I didn't really need them. You can also ask for a pediatric needle which you can barely feel. Some persons who draw blood are much better than others and I have had many blood tests that I barely felt. I put off going to the ENT for months because I was afraid of a needle procedure to drain (what I thought) was a peritonsillar abcess. Then I'm told it's cancer. The delay probably cost me a stage or two.

The port is probably a good idea. It will make it far more comfortable to get the chemo and with the lung node issue, he may have a more extensive chemo protocol than normal.

You may need meds for anxiety as well. As you are finding out, the carsgiving/support aspect of this is very difficult as well.

It sounds to me like he will be fine - he needs to process the whole mess. Being told that you have a life threatening disease is quite a shock. Add to that the need to make vital decisions rapidly, unrealistic fears and expectations and it can be a very difficult time - especially pre-treatment. It also changes something inside of you forever. It's been siad that "you can be cancer free but you are never free from cancer". He is entitled to his feelings which can ne very scary and also very dynamic in the early phases.If he is a cop then he is used to facing danger and he just needs to get into the right zone. It really doesn't take a lot of courage to fight this. The real trick to it is to take it one day at a time and stay in the moment rather than freaking out over what might or may not be, in the future. Once they get a treatment plan worked out things will get better I promise you.