Angelia, ask for the antidepressants. You are going through a tough ordeal/nightmare and you need all the help you can get. They won't make you dance but can help take the edge off and maybe give you a little more energy to deal with this. Unfortunately, they don't work right away.
Also, ask about ativan to take the edge off the anxiety. Small doses work wonders.
One day at a time and just keep looking at your little boys.
Nancy