| Joined: Jun 2002 Posts: 7 Member | OP Member Joined: Jun 2002 Posts: 7 | HI!EVERYBODYI'M SORRY TO INFORM YOU MY HUSBAND PHIL HAS LOST HIS BATTLE OF ORAL CANCER.HE PASSED AWAY ON 12/6.
THE STORY STARTED LAST YEAR AND IT BECAME WORSE AS TIME WENT ON.ON 12/3 I STARTED TO NOTICE THAT HIS FACE HAD BECOME VERY SWOLLEN (EDEMA) WHICH HE HAD BEFORE BECAUSE HE HAD TROUBLE LAYING DWN TO SLEEP, SO I THOUGHT THIS TOO WOULD PASS.HE STARTED BECOMING VERY INCOHERENT THEN ON 12/6 IN THE MORNING I FOUND HIM UNCONSCIENCE ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR.I CALLED HIS DR AND THEY TOLD ME TO CALL RESCUE AND BRING HIM TO THE ER.WHEN WE ARRIVED AT THE ER THEY TOOK BLOOD,AND THE RESULTS SHOWED VERY LG DEPOSITS OF CALCIUM WHICH THEY SAID WAS FROM THE CANCER.THEY THEN TOOK HIM FOR XRAYS AND RETURNED HIM TO THE ER.I WENT HOME TO GET HIM PJ'S,WHEN I GOT BACK HIS ONCOLOGISTS CALLED AND TOLD ME THAT SHE THOUGHT THAT THE CANCER WAS TERMINAL AND THAT HE ONLY HAD 2-3 MNTHS TO LIVE, AND TO CONSIDER HOSPICE CARE AT HOME OR AT A FACILITY.THEY THEN TOOK HIM TO CT SCAN AND I WENT OUTSIDE TO GET SOME AIR. THE NURSE SAID THE DR WANTED TO TALK TO ME, HE SAID YOUR HUSBAND EXPIRED IN THE CT SCAN HIS HEART STOPPED.HE SAID THAT THE CT SCAN SHOWED THAT THE CANCER HAD SPREAD TO HIS THROAT, DWN INTO HIS LUNGS, AND IN HIS BONES.THIS WORSE THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. MY HUSBAND, BEST FRIEND, LOVER AND SOUL MATE LEFT THE EARTH.I NOW FEEL LIKE MY LIFE IS OVER.
WHAT I AM CONFUSED ABT IS IN AUG AFTER THE SURGERY THE PET SCAN CAME BACK CLEAR, THE DR SAID HE WAS CANCER FREE FOR NOW,AND NOW HE IS DEAD. HOW COULD IT HAVE SPREAD ALL OVER SO FAST.HAS ANYONE EVER HEARD OF THIS BEFORE.I'M THINKING THAT THEY DID THE SURGERY REMOVED HIS TONGUE PUT HIM THROUGH SO MUCH WHEN THEY ALREADY KNEW HE COULDN'T BE CURED.
TO MAKE MATTER WORSE HE WASN'T DEAD 1 HR AND HIS MOTHER WAS ASKING ME WHO'S NAME WAS ON THE DEED TO OUR HSE.THEN THEY OFFERED TO PAY FOR SOME OF THE FUNERAL. MY MOTHER IN LAW CALLED ME ON MON AND SAID"I'M FINANCIALLY STRAPPED, I CAN'T HELP YOU GOOD LUCK KIDDO."HIS FAMILY TORTURED HIM THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS SICK.NOW THIS
WELL, I THANK EVERYBODY ON HERE FOR THE SUPPORT WHEN I NEEDED IT.AND PERIODICALLY I WILL COME BACK TO CHAT. BUT, I PROBABLY NEED A LITTLE TIME TO HEAL
THANKS AGAIN | | | | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 45 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 45 | Leonor,
My deepest condolences go out to you. I am the same age as your husband and was diagnosed with cancer in September 2000. While your loss causes me anxiety surrounding my future, it also increases my resolve to carry on. Surround yourself with support in these trying times. My family, and I can assure you, many others from this forum will be keeping you in our thoughts and prayers.
Dave
Stage I diagnosed 9/18/2000
Dave
| | | | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 102 Senior Member (100+ posts) | Senior Member (100+ posts) Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 102 | I am so sorry for your loss. Julie
Julie Wife to Kelly SSC tonsil Stage IV July 2000
| | | | Joined: Jul 2002 Posts: 51 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Jul 2002 Posts: 51 | I am so sorry for your loss. Actually, it is a loss to all of us who have loved ones with this dreaded illness. My heart and prayers go out to you. LM | | | | Joined: Jun 2002 Posts: 194 Senior Member (100+ posts) | Senior Member (100+ posts) Joined: Jun 2002 Posts: 194 | Hi. I have watched your posts all along about your husband and was so sorry to read of your loss.We have experienced a lot of death in our family and time is the only thing that helps.In a way the fact that your husbands heart stopped , may have been a blessing, because he did not have to suffer any more.The two or three months they thought he had , may not have been good ones. As for your relatives, I believe when you do not do right on this earth, sooner or later you pay the price.Don't think about them , but about the joy and love you and your husband shared,grieve, and move on to live for both of you.You are in my and I know many of the boards prayers. gnelson
gnelson, StageIV, cancer free since Nov.9,2000
| | | | Anonymous Unregistered | Anonymous Unregistered | Lenore,
So sorry to hear about your loss. Please know that many of us are thinking of you and wishing you strength to weather through this time.
Take care of yourself, Dinah | | | | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 234 Platinum Member (200+ posts) | Platinum Member (200+ posts) Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 234 | Lenore,
My deepest sympathy for you in the loss of your husband and best friend. I know this is very hard, but try to stand strong. Keep coming back to this board so that we can be behind you in your time of sorrow. Please take care. My thoughts are with you.
Anne.
Anne G.Younger Life has never been better.
| | | | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 33 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 33 | Dear Leonor So sorry to hear about the sad loss of your beloved husband Phil. My family and I will hold you in our thoughts and prayers. Take Care
Love, Kathleen | | | | Joined: Dec 2002 Posts: 36 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: Dec 2002 Posts: 36 | I'm very sorry to hear about your loss,It is at times like this we need to pull all of our strength together. My prayers are with you God Bless Ray
Stage 4b Tonsil cancer Survivor! Dx 11/05/02 SCC 2cm tumor in left tonsil 7x4cm neck node L/side with other positive nodes on right, Wide field Tonsillectomy Nov 20/02 Tx 1/2/03, Cisplatin Chemo x3, IMRT x 40 L/Neck Disection 08/15/03
| | | | Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 188 Gold Member (100+ posts) | Gold Member (100+ posts) Joined: Mar 2002 Posts: 188 | Lenore..........I'm so sorry for your loss. Write when you're feeling better. Sincerely, Donna
SCC first time 1989, with a diagnoses of 'cancer in situ' removed lesion, no other treatments. SCC recurrence 1997 of tongue and floor of the mouth. Stage III /IV Hemmiglossectomy (removed over 60% of tongue/ floor of the mouth), free flap, modified neck, RAD and Chemo(cisplatin, 5fu) simutainously. Cancer free 6, yes, six, years!
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