Hi Everyone,

I just wanted to write and let everyone know things for Grandma are at the worst. They put her in a "drug induced coma" and we are just waiting for her to pass on. The cancer ended up spreading to her lungs and they gave up on the treatment (the five they did do....wow, pretty sad for 3 months). I can't believe all the suffering she has done.....she is not giving up without a fight either. She keeps trying to sit up and they just up the medication. This cancer will have taken my Grandma in less then 3 months. I am going to get some help after this.....I have never felt so bad in my entire life. Take care all.

Christy

I am so very, very sorry Christy. I'm glad to hear that you are going to get help after all this. You have certainly done everything you could to help your grandma and to be there for her.
(((((Christy)))))

Cecelia

Dear Christy

You and your Grandma are in my heart. I am so sorry that you will lose her soon - you obviously have a very special bond which will last forever.

With love from Helen

Dear Christy, Thou I know you have a heavy heart and there is nothing worse in this life than to watch a love one slip away right before your eyes, please remember this, you have learned so so much from this. You and your Grandma got to spend her final days together. You got the chance to tell her all the things you wanted to say. You got to hold her hand, kiss her cheek, hug her neck. Some do not get this time. I say what a crying shame they don't. Tho it is tearing you apart, and you have no idea how in this world you will ever make it thru this, the day will come that you will be so thankful that you had this time. Right now you cannot see past the pain, the hurt, the loss or the sight of it all. One day these memories will not cause you to cry. They will not cause you pain. They will make you proud that you were there and that you had the honor of being there to help her make her journey into heaven. This are the memories that make us into wonderful human beings. These are the memories that will keep your Grandmother alive in your heart...You were blessed to be a part of all this, Christy, one day you will be able to see past the pain and the hurt and know in your heart that you were there for her and as she was always there for you. I know this because I too have been thru this, when I lost my MOMA. Lord will a heavy heart, Christy, I am thinking of you and your family. WE ALL ARE. Always Miss Vicki

Christy,

I am so very sorry you and your Grandma have to go through this. You are right to seek help afterwards. I never joined a grief support group or took anti-depressants after Heather died, but I should have. I have been functioning for the past year, but that is about all. I realized I need to get back to living and recently started on an anti-depressant. It is good that you are willing to seek help.

Miss Vickie,
What a beautiful post. You have expressed it so perfectly, I have nothing to add.

Take care of yourself Christy.
With love,
Rosie

Christy,
My prayers are with you and your grandma. My grandma died about 8 years ago, and it was just days after getting really sick and into the hospital. I was there to hold her hand and talk to her even though she was in a coma. She did squeeze my hand when I asked her to if she could hear me. It was so hard, but I was so glad that I could be there and be with her some. You will cherish these memories as hard as they are now.
Take care and God bless,
Debbie

Hi again Everyone,

Sorry to have to write back so soon. After I posted this I was getting ready to go up to the hospital again. I had just came home to feed the family and clean up. I got a strange feeling and phoned my Auntie (she was with my Grandma and had a cell phone available). My Auntie didn't answer the phone so I left a voice mail. Within a minute my Mom phoned me back from my Auntie's phone. My Grandma had just passed away.....the very second I phoned (9:58 pm). I have cried a river I am sure, but some how, I feel some relief that the pain has finally stopped. She is probably with my Grandpa now.....and she probably even got him to Bingo (he hated that game). I am sure he would love to join her now.....:-)) It has been 20 years they have been apart. It has been the longest 3 months of my life, but I was glad I was with my Grandma every day. Before I left tonight I put my cheek against hers and told her I would be back later. I told her she was the best Grandma that anyway could ever have and I loved her so very much. She was so drugged up and couldn't move, but she still managed to press her cheek against mine. I will hold that in my heart forever. I am a little sad I didn't make it up there to be with her until the very end.....I hope I can get over that one day, but I know I did the most I could, and I hope she is proud of me for it.....:-))

Hugs and Kisses,

Christy

Dear Christy,

God bless you and your grandma. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss but please know your grandma is a better place now - a place where there is no pain or suffering. You've been the pillar of strength and love and for that I know your grandma truly appreciated all you did and have done for her. Please cherish all the good times and memories you had made together for these will last a life time. I know it's hard to lose someone you love as I've experienced this just a year ago. Please know I'm praying for you and your family. God bless you - you are truly an angel.

Lots of hugs, Nancy

Christy,
I'm so sorry about you're Grandma. She is with the angels and now has no pain. You and your family are in my prayers.
Mary Lee

Christy,
I am so sorry. You have my heartfelt sympathy. And I know your Grandma is very proud of you. How could she not? You are a wonderful, caring, loving granddaughter. I would be proud to have my granddaughters grow up to be like you. You take care of yourself.

Rosie