#29339 09-07-2007 04:18 PM | Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 580 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 580 | Julie,
Well, I'm glad you are getting good advice. I hope you never have to use it. That was my best opinion, glad to see I wasn't off the mark. I guess paying attention in anatomy class was helpful.
Blessings to you all,
Mike
Dentist since 1995, 12 year Cancer Survivor, Father, Husband, Thankful to so many who supported me on my journey so far, and more than happy to comfort a friend. Live, Laugh, Love & Learn.
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#29340 09-07-2007 10:20 PM | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | Hi Julie and Mike
time difference means i lost track of the thread after i went to bed at 2.30 am.Glad you have got some practical advice Julie and hope you never ever have to try and put it into practise.
love and warmest wishes liz
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
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#29341 09-08-2007 09:51 AM | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 | Julie, DO NOT CALL 911! They are required, by US law, to take heroic life saving measures! Your hospice people should be guiding you through this and should have given you specific instructions on this issue. His advanced directives and DNR orders should be keep readily available. My hospice people told me to keep them on the refrigerator so they were easy to locate in a panic situation. Even with these, the 911 EMT's may ignore them.
Liz's post was truly inspired and she just went through this traumatizing event. Her advice is absolutely accurate.
He may need to be moved to a hospice facility so that you can be truly be a family member and not part of the care team. Would it be possible to get a full time nurse (or even team of caregivers)?
I am so sorry that you are faced with this and will keep you both in my prayers as you face this phase of the journey.
Gary Allsebrook *********************************** Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2 Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy) ________________________________________________________ "You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
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#29342 09-08-2007 12:30 PM | Joined: Sep 2003 Posts: 1,244 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Sep 2003 Posts: 1,244 | Gary Your advice on 911 is spot on, (like our 999) But if Julie is on her own and this happens she needs someone who will respond quickly to help her deal with this. No way should she be in the postion of dealing with this on her own Sunshine.. love and hugs Helen
SCC Base of tongue, (TISN0M0) laser surgery, 10/01 and 05/03 no clear margins. Radial free flap graft to tonsil pillar, partial glossectomy, left neck dissection 08/04
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#29343 09-08-2007 02:36 PM | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 | In the US the typical protocol is to call the hospice nurse and they come right over.
Gary Allsebrook *********************************** Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2 Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy) ________________________________________________________ "You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
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#29344 09-08-2007 07:23 PM | Joined: May 2007 Posts: 44 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | OP Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: May 2007 Posts: 44 | Thanks for the tip about the 911. I was concerned about that but wasn't sure.As I stated before the doctor said only a surgeon might be able to stop it and if they did it would be very temporary. I think he said to rush him to the hospital as a means of keeping us busy. He is well aware of how far the hospital is Hospice would be here as soon as possible if I needed them but they do not provide 24 hour care, and really Rich doesn't need it. He is alert, orientated, and capable of most of his adls by himself. I think I have mentioned before very stubburn. Today we went to a car show with his kids and grandkids. I was quietly packing up dark towels and gauze and such to take and he stated we were all going over board. Denial isn't always bad is it? Thanks everyone Julie | | |
#29345 09-08-2007 08:18 PM | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | I am being very cautious here Julie,because i am not in possession of all or really any of the facts in Riches case. Robin was alert and able to do for himself right up to the minute he fell asleep really,so please dont be overly influenced by his apparent capabilities. Things change so rapidly it is breathtaking,so dont lower your guard,and the minute you feel anything is different,even the most innocuos silly remark he may make,then look at your care plan again.
The one thing i have to say and i dont want or mean to be insensitiveis is that at some point Rich's stubborness must be put on the back burner and your want and needs made clear to him and the care staff.You have a right to some choices after all you are shouldering the lions share of responsibility.
I thank god every day that Robins attitude changed so much once he was in full time hospice care,and the knowledge that he had other people to take the burden of comfort and pain control over, made him more able to see how i was coping and feeling and bring that into his equation of how to deal with everything. I also had the luxury of a back up from the staff who always spent time talking to me and Robin ,and were able to discuss matters with him that he was being difficult about.Compromises were more easily reached with gentle explanations from the staff and i was relieved not to have to be the one constantly passing on information he really didnt want to hear,and almost blamed me for telling him.
I think about you both daily and will never forget your first PM to me when i joined this group it made me realise i wasnt the only one battling with more than one demon.
love liz
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
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#29346 09-09-2007 05:30 AM | Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 794 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 794 | Dear Julie and Rich, My prayers are with you. Donna
Donna CG to Mom, dx 4/25/07 with tongue cancer,T3N0,tx began 7/6/07, 31 tx's of IMRT, 8 cycles of Erbitux. Brachytherapy, surgery, left neck dissection and temp trach placed all on 9/17/07, trach removed 10/17/07. ORN of jaw, late effect of radiation symptoms. **lost my beautiful mother on 5/5/11.
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#29347 09-09-2007 03:03 PM | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 718 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 718 | Julie, my heart goes out to you in this impossible time. You and Rich are in our prayers. Margaret ---------- C/G: Husband, 48 (at time of dx) Dx 5/18/07 SCC, BOT, lymph node involvement. T1N2BM0. (Stage 4a, G2/3) Tx 6/18 - 8/3/07, IMRT x 33 Cisplatin x3 (stopped after 1st dose due to hearing issues). Weekly Erbitux started 6/27/07 completed 8/6/07.
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#29348 09-10-2007 07:55 PM | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 |
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
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