Andrew111,
It is completely normal to be feeling the way your are. One minute up and the next at rock bottom. We are all rooting for you. You are ahead of many whom have come here by preparing questions just make sure you ask them all and get the responses written down so you can look over them after. Your doctors will be very used to this and should be willing to slow down so that you can ask and understand the answers to every question.
This site has a whole ton of excellent information and first hand experience. You will also not find a more caring, compassionate, intelligent and supportive group, in my opinion.
Keep strong, and if I can be of any assistance let me know.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Cheers,
Mike