Thanks for your responses- I will try the heat and keep working on it with the Therabite, and I'm supposed to see the swallowing therapist soon. I had been avoiding heat because my skin was burned from the radiation but it's better now so I can try it.

I do wonder about a simple surgery to release the scar tissue. I also wonder if part of the stiffness is caused by the muscle flap procedure I had done- this is where they cut a flap from the sternoclomastoid muscle(which runs from behind your ear down your neck) and they attach it to the zygomatic bone. It does go over the jawbone, so if that part got scar tissue then that would make sense. The doctor says this shouldn't case trismus but who knows.
They did that procedure so I would not have a dent in my face where they removed the parotid gland.
Anyway, thanks for the suggestions.
Mel