Sharon and Joe,
Good luck with the surgery. When I had my ND, I also had my tonsilectomy at the same time. I can relate to the pain that caused. In fact I don't remember any pain from the ND just the tonsils. The only thing that I felt different from the ND was a little tightness in the muscle.
As far as your question about if a node comes back positive. Probably best to ask his Dr. If he has had that area radiated before, depending on how much, he probably won't be able to have it radiated again.
I was in the hospital for 2 days after my ND. They put a tube in my neck and measured the drainage and when it got to a certain level is when they said I could go home.
Best of thoughts and my prayers are with you two.