The very best thing you can do for them at this time is to keep their homelife and their day to day schedule as close to how it was as possible. I had a 9, 11, and 12 year old when I was going through treatment and that's how we played it, I pushed myself to make sure I was up and about as much as possible and we kept their lives as close to the same as possible. If they wanted to talk about it, we talked, but we didn't press and push at them to talk about it all the time. Mine came through it with such ease, I was proud of them and of my family.
Good luck with it!

SCC Left Mandible. Jaw replaced with bone from leg. Neck disection, 37 radiation treatments. Recurrence 8-28-07, stage 2, tongue. One third of tongue removed 10-4-07. 5-23-08 chemo started for tumor behind swallowing passage, Our good friend and much loved OCF member Minnie has been lost to the disease (RIP 10-29-08). We will all miss her greatly.