We're trying anyway.

Got the staples out today,(ouch), then the ENT wanted to do an endoscopy (I think that's what it's called), basically run a tube up my nose to look down my throat. This was suggested by the oncologist to make double sure there's not another primary that hasn't shown up on the 2 pet/ct scans I've had in the past month.

I just bloomin' panicked. Anxiety attack big time. I mean BIG time. The sight of the forceps, nasal spreader thingy, and the cotton tape he was goign to shove up there just put me in panick attack. Got him to postphone for a couple of weeks. The staple removal job (about 50) plus haveing to get the radiaion mask re-done was enough for one day. The ENT doc doesn't really think there's anything going on there anyway.

Now, am I making a big deal out of nothing aned just being a big baby? I've been medically violated in every other bodily opening the past few months, and I do mean EVERY other opening, and I couldn't deal a tube up my schnozz today.

Asked the doc about the jaw thing, he said it will get better, had to move some things like jaw muscles about during surgery. Then hollered at me for going back to work yesterday. Said I should have taken at least a week or 10 days off at least.

Thanks for your support everybody. I'll probably add some little stories here and there on this "second time around" experience. May bore the heck out of you all, but it's theraputic for me.
Thanks
Bob