Karen,
Sorry to hear about all that you and your dad have gone through and then having to deal with that insensitive jerk.
Please check this page from the OCF website;
http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/resources/cancer_centers.htm For quick answers you can use the search engine from the main page or the one at the top of this page to find answers to almost anything that you have questions about.
And remember, statistics are just that, statistics and they mean very little. (Type in statistics on the forum search engine and see previous discussions about statistics).
Good luck to you and your dad and keep us posted.
Jerry