Christy,

I'm not an expert, but from the little I do know, I'm afraid you're right.....it doesn't look good. I don't want to upset you, but I think lymphadenopathy is usually present in advanced stages. Contralateral means the opposite side, so they think it might be on the right side also. Extension into the maxilla sounds like it is invading the bone. I'm not sure how well chemo and RAD combat it once it is in the bone. Surgery might be an option, but you said she didn't want that. And at her age and with her poor condition, surgery might be more than she could handle. I'm so sorry to have to tell you this, but I feel it is better to be prepared. Sugarcoating it isn't much help in the long run.

With that being said, there is every reason for you to continue to fight to get your grandma the care she needs. Even if there is nothing the doctors can do to cure the cancer, she still deserves decent care. At the very least, they should be making an effort to effectively manage her pain.

I'm so very sorry you have to go through this. I was very close to my grandma also, closer to her than to my mother, so I can understand what you are going through. I wish you strength in the days ahead.

Sending rainbows & hugs,
Rosie