Dear Daughter, I kinda hate being the first to jump in here, but what have the doctors told you about choices like chemo or radiation if she refuses surgery? Have they given her any other options? As to how you would care for her and what to expect, none of us want to paint that picture for you, but you can read for yourself the experiences on this forum of patients and caregivers who fought to the end. If you are to be her primary caregiver, your life will change as the disease progresses. You would do well to find a Hospice in your area and talk to them if she doesn't have treatment. Please stay with us so we can support you as needed. Amy in the Ozarks