I noticed a growth in August, a lymph node on the right side of my neck was swollen. I haven’t felt anything this whole time. Some slight trouble swallowing or feeling of something in my throat here and there, not consistently and mostly when I’m anxious. On thanksgiving I noticed my tonsil was swollen and the day before I was finally able to see my ent I noticed and even bigger lump closer/underneath the back of my jaw. That’s the one they biopsied last week and I’ve been miserable since, mentally and physically, it feels like it’s grown 10 times since then even though I know that’s not true. I got the results that it was metastatic SCC Thursday and will see the doctor tomorrow to discuss the way forward. The wait is excruciating. I’m so scared things will deteriorate in the meantime. Every morning I wake up grateful to still be here but fearful of how I’ll feel today.