Philip,

Your clients are very lucky to have you looking out for their interests even when you are faced with a crisis in your own life.

I cared for my husband for close to four years at home. If anything, those were times when we drew closer than before; we created new memories for us. We tried to carry on s normal life, we made jokes, we people-watched together at the hospital and we discussed the medical options together. I had the feeling that we were fellow travelers on this cancer journey. Honestly, if he had shut me out by not letting me participate in the worst trial of his life, I would have been really hurt and sad. I imagine your wife would probably feel the same way.

You would be amazed at how many people seek help from a therapist during treatment. At our hospital, there is a whole department that does the work. Like my family doctor used to say to me, "You would go get help if you have a broken leg, going to a therapist is no different." We all grieve, get angry are filled with fear when we hear the dreaded diagnosis. It's okay to cry "at the drop of a hat" like you said. Some people may grit their teeth and bear it, others may take solace in learning everything they can about cancer and the treatments; there's no one way to deal with such a difficult stumbling block in life. Give yourself permission to do what brings you relief.

Here's a shout-out to your lovely wife.