Hi Sarge, well it sucks that one so young has this story to tell.
First off I want to say that I am really suprised that with 3 positive nodes you were not offered chemo.
My advice is to get yourself another opinion at a Comprehensive cancer Center ASAP. There has been much research that shows where you are treated matters. You have a better chance of survival if you are treated at a CCC.
You are very young and you should ensure that you have the best treatment with the best outcome.
You should be seen by a whole Tumour Board and your case and treatment decided apon by them. This will involve surgeons, radiation and chemo Oncologists , dentists etc all together.
If you are seeing a surgeon. Then a radiation guy and then maybe, a chemo doc you are not at a CCC.
That's my best advice for you. Get a second opinion now before you let that surgeon at you again.
Thinking of you, Tammy.

Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis
DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT.
PET 6/11 clear.
R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED
Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in.
March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!