Hi Bob,
My husband Lee had his surgery-total tongue and part of larynx removed in April of this year. It is a terribly tough road, but she can get through it with support. The chemo and rad are tough as well, but nothing is impossible. he has finally turned a corner and is doing much better. He still has peg-may be permanent and trach as well, but his energy and spirits are returning. I know how overwhelming it can be-they are just so sick for so long. I am a nurse and I was completely overwhelmed when Lee first came home and for months afterward. But, it really does get better, or maybe we get bettet in coping. Whatever the case, things will get better and she will carve a life, albeit a different one, but her life, and that is good.
Best of Luck,
Doreen