Dave,

Welcome to this site. I'm sorry you need to be here, especially at your age, but I know you'll get a lot of support and help here.

You didn't mention where on your tongue the tumor is -- that can be one factor in determining the best course of treatment. There are many people on this site who have dealt with various forms of tongue cancer (some of whom have flaps and can comment on the quality of life aspect post-treatment).

This is a disease that you want to attack all-out on the first time around (with a solid, multi-disciplined cancer team) to try to minimize the chances of a recurrence. I know I heard plenty of dire-sounding caveats about quality of life before I had surgery and radiation, and I was envisioning the worst. I'm one of those who had surgery first, then radiation, and I ended up losing a little less than 20% of my tongue (no flap) and many lymph nodes on the left side of my neck. While the treatment phase itself was tough, especially radiation, I've had very little long-term effect on appearance, speech, eating, or range of motion in my neck and arms. Most of the people who have met me in the years since my treatment have never suspected that I had cancer, unless they were told about it.

Feel free to come back here often with your questions -- and be sure that your medical team can answer the questions you raise with them about your upcoming treatment.

Cathy