It sounds like things just keep escalating for you, Keleigh. I don't know if there is. Simple answer, however, there are many options before such a drastic measure. It's hard to decipher where you are from and I can only speak to US healthcare. We have home healthcare and your father would qualify here. They provide an aide to help with keeping the basic living area kept up, some meals, a nurse to check things like the feeding tube. It's paid for my Medicare, here, if qualified.

Are you sure some of what you are experiencing is fear of the unknown? Or maybe, perhaps, you have a preferred method of dealing with things and your brother/father aren't being as thorough in thinking some of this through.

The bottom line is your father's health and safety may be at stake and if you feel strongly his health is jeopardized, you have to act. If it's not, you have to work through the issues until they are reasonably resolved in your mine. Being far away doesn't preclude involvement. Contacting a social worker your father should have been assigned would be the first step here.

Best wishes in all this. Caregiving is tough enough, without the geographical distance.

SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023