Hi questions,
Based on your second post, it seems the wait and see is pretty reasonable from a medical perspective. If this was not there a few months ago then it is not likely a oral melanoma.

Probably not going to help make you feel less anxiety but from my chair, the general idea is oral cancers are slow to grow, giving you some time to diagnose.

If you have a lot of anxiety about it then ask to get a biopsy done. It is a simple and fast procedure and if it puts the question to bed, then it is likely worth it for you to do.

Good luck
Don