Welcome Jim,
I'm glad you found this site...I too didn't find it until after I was the passive patient for three surgeries (Radical neck, lymph nodes & teeth) and radiation. Since I have found this site I have become my own advocate and have learned so much about questions to ask and answers to expect. And when to go to the doctor.
Sorry I can't answer your questions, but I can tell you I am fighting right now with the spread of my cancer and truly know the bitter feelings you have. This is also a great place to vent. And when I throw things no one gets upset.
Please try and remember my favorite stolen phrase:
"Cancer is a word - not a sentence."
I'm sure someone will be along that can hopefully answer your questions.
Take care,
Dinah