Hi,
I thought I wrote the reply like, "I know better than you, so listen to me", and that is not what I wanted to convey to you, so I am editing this post. I'm just concerned about the close margins and the other spot that is a few mm away, and it sounds to me like you need to make really sure right now what all is going on. From what I have read (I am not a doctor, but my doctor has told me this as well), for scc of the oral tongue you stand a better chance of getting a handle on it if it is surgically removed from the outset, taking wide margins. Poorly differentiated cells respond better to chemo than well differentiated ones--it kills the poorly diff. ones more easily. I can only imagine how scary and difficult this is at your age and with two young ones. We have had several women with tongue cancer at an early age and with young children on this site. Now this is the rest of my post before I added this paragraph:

I think you might want a second opinion. If it is poorly differentiated, you've had scc once before, and you have another focus in your mouth, I am surprised they are not recommending chemo too. You don't want it to come back again, so pulling out all the stops it seems to me would be beneficial. Are you at a cancer center? Has there been a tumor board?

I know this is not what you asked, but you don't want to waste time, or just get the radiation and find out later you should have had chemo.

Sorry you are having to deal with this, especially with young children.
Anne