It is okay to be scared. I am scared almost all the time, but try not to show it. I too went through issues with ENT's and Oral Surgeon's missing the cancer saying ti was just a clogged salivary gland or a dental work problem. the only thing was, I did not have any dental work. Turns out it was cancer, only my dentist pegged it, but couldn't do the biopsy for some reason. Same thing happened my second time around with the ENT that did the surgery the first time. He did not see anything to worry about, but to his credit this was all after a clear PEt scan. He decided to give me peace of mind and do the surgery turns out is was cancer again. Had I not stayed on time of it and was my own advocate nothing would have gotten done either time. Not my ENT biopsies my tongue whenever there is anything questionable going on. Which is why I am having another biopsy next week, because like your partner I have some soreness on my tongue. This is is in the same spot as the previous cancer and the white spot continues to grow. Keep us posted.