This post was from Dianne MH and I moved from a dulpicate topic that you started. I'm new to this editing stuff so I couldn't quite figure out how to move it properly but I'll get it.

Hi Beth, I hate to see you so upset, but then again, I don't blame you. You are too young to have to deal with this rotton cancer. I don't think I have ever hated anything so much in my life. I am 54 & I whine because of all the stuff I can't eat anymore, the constant dry mouth and the fear. We all think about "it" coming back. But, you know what..our state of mind has such an impact on our health. Please think of all the good that has happened. They caught it, removed it and more treatment is still to come to keep it away. Think how lucky we are that we have the benefits of modern medical advances!

Try to look at the cup half full (with water!) I know, it's not fair honey, but it is what it is. There is no fair reason why you have to deal with this, but you are not alone. We are all in this with you & understand all the emotions, so you vent whenever you want to. If nothing else, at least you sure earned that privilege!
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BOT T3N2M0 No surgery, 38radiation treatments,4 chemo rounds, peg removed 11/08, still have a port. Treatments ended 6/20/08. So far, so Good ! "I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much !"

David

Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.