Hi,

I'm new at this, so I hope I'm proceeding in the correct fashion.

I'm the supporter of a loved-one with cancer. A year ago my 49-year-old sister-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 base tongue cancer. She had radical 18-hour surgery to remove her tongue and to have a free flap attached. Unfortunately the first free flap didn't take, and she underwent two more surgeries until the third-attempt finally took. She was in the hospital for 25 long days.

She and my mother-in-law moved in with my husband and me, to ensure she didn't need to worry about anything except getting better. In December of 2009, after 60-days of RT and 3-rounds of intensive chemo, we got the "congratulations you beat it" statement from a relatively small-town (but patient-loved) Oncologist.

On Monday, much to our dismay, we were told her cancer was back, just three short months after her original treatment ended. We're being told it's more aggressive than her original cancer, and that the Oncologist was surprised it came back so fast and so aggressive.

This re-occurrence is "resting" on her jugular and they're worried it will compromise the main artery and she'll bleed-to-death. We've been told surgery is not an option as she had radiation, and I get the feeling the Dr's are at a loss on how to proceed.

Naturally I now want her to now go to the best doctors in the north-east, perhaps ones that are well-versed in her type of cancer. With that being said, I'm only a supporter; and for the time-being, she is content with her current medical team. It's difficult as I know she's slipping away from us. I just want to scream THIS IS YOUR LIFE! DO ANYTHING TO SAVE IT! But I know I can't say that. And she�s been through a lot over the last year. I just smile, hug and kiss her, and tell her that I love her every day.

Thus I've turned to this forum for support, and as a way to voice my frustration and fears...

Thank you for having me,

Tracey