It sounds as if your husband is discouraged and it is controling him . Maybe a professional to talk with him might help?? He has to either get nousrishment or die. This for sure none of us want to happen. Good luck and he is in the prayers as you are also.

Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here