So glad you're finding support here--we've been there so definitely lean on the group and feel free to contact me directly for support and my perspective.
You're in my thoughts, Wendy.
Esther

Squamous cell carcinoma of tongue (never smoked and not HPV related) stage 4 diagnosed 8-2016; #6 trach, partial glossectomy, reconstruction. neck dissection 9-2016. 3 nodes out of 25 removed were positive for cancer--refused radiation & chemo; monitored via quarterly MRIs.