Thanks Colleen. I may be difficult to some, but I'm not, we'll, lets be polite, and say be unwise. I know my illness pretty well, side effects, treatments, but know when to raise the white flag lol, and seek help, and most always listen to, and follow my doctors suggestions, advise.

I also know what it's like to be a caregiver, and see a family member suffer, die. I had three brothers suffering illnesses that either paralyzed or severely debilitated them, causing their deaths at young ages, 26, 48, 52. It was not easy after two had passed, Then felt disappointed for my third that I coud not help for a while when diagnosed with cancer, and unfortunately, he passed away from a UTI two months later, while I was in the hospital myself, near death from chemo. I felt guilty I wasn't around, thinking things may have been different if I was, and believe my brother was so worried about me, he did not want to trouble anyone, but it went too far, and shut down his kidneys. I could not even go to his funeral being in critical condition, and doctors would not let me leave. I has to grieve his loss from my hospital bed, and finally went home 4 months later. Its difficult even now, three years later.