My wife, the Lovely Linda, has breast cancer. We found out yesterday, the result from needle biopsys done on monday. There are 2 of "well differentiated, infiltrating , grade 1 of 3 ductal carcinomas." As I understand, "grade", as opposed to "stage", tells how likely it is to spresd. She goes for an MRI today and then her doctor is setting up an appointment with a surgeon. I feel sick just writing this, I feel sick thinking about it, I feel sick telling family about it, I'm sick of cancer.
Oh David,
I'm so sorry you have to go through it all again. I felt sick reading your post. I'm not very good with my words but just wanted you to know that my thoughts are with you and your family.
Minh
David I am so sorry to read about your wife. Cancer is so unfair. It sucks!!!!! I will keep both of you in my prayers.
Me too David. Just know that you have all the wonderful people on the forum pulling for your wife and praying you both have the strength to overcome this. You've done it once, David, so you can do it again with your wife. Be strong for her and we will all be thinking and praying for good results.
julieann
David, my good thoughts are with both of you. This is most definitely unfair. Shit. I wish your wife all the positive things I can think of.
David 2
Get her to the best breast cancer center available.
That sucks!! Cancer Sucks!! I am so sorry to hear that. I will be keeping your family in my prayers.
David- Hang tough. You guys can overcome this!
David,
Quite a few of us have also had BC. None of it is good but with the recent improvements made in treatment there is more hope for a successful recovery and long term survival. I have a sister who has had a very agressive form of BC for 6 years and has been responding well to chemo and meds which seem to be keeping it under control. I tease her because she is like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland. The spots grow and disappear and sometimes her scans come back clear for a while and she is off chemo for a few months. If she had this a few years earlier she would probably not be here today.
I would recommend that you discus Linda's case with your doctors. I was encouraged when I was told that the drs. I had were the best for what I had. It would be good to talk w the cancer support person(s) at your facility. There is so much info and support for BC that the info can be overwhelming.
Praying for you in your new role as caretaker.
Malka
David,
I, too, am so sorry that your wife has breast cancer. My Mom had BC back in 2003 and is a healthy 82 year old woman today. It is stressful and given what you have already been through, probably even more so. I wish your wife the best outcome. Being her caregiver will be a role reversal for you but so very worth it. All the best to you as you embrace this new challenge.
Anita
Oh David - I'm so sorry to hear of your wife's breast cancer. I'll be praying for the two of you to be surrounded by the very best doctors and support people around to help you through this latest challenge.
David, Sorry to hear that you have been striken by this disease again. I wish you the best outcome. My prayers are with you two for great Dr's and strength.
Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear this David. I will keep Linda in my prayers. We are here for you as you set out on the caretaker role.
Thank you all very much. I know that I have great support from my OCF friends. I've looked around at some BC forums and I haven't seen any that come close to matching the close "family" feel of OCF. As for taking on the caregiver role, I know I can't do anywhere near as great a job as as Linda did for me but I'll just have to give it my best, won't I. Chico has a lot of great doctor's as it's a popular retirement area and has a Cal State University campus. Enloe Regional Cancer Center is top notch as ias the Valley Breast Care Center. My mother and sister both have survived BC, Mom for 11 years and my sis for 6, after being treated at these facilities and we have faith in them. Meanwhile, I have to see about getting a refund for our air fare to Puerto Vallarta (I did buy insurance which covers medical situations) and see what I can work out with the resorts down there. The mundane concerns of life don't just go away at times like this. I'm just very happy to have you all to turn to to make me feel a bit less stressed and a bit more blessed.
David I am so very sorry to hear about your wife. I am so very sick of cancer. My mom died of bone cancer 1996, my dad died of lung cancer 1997,Bobs mom had breast cancer at 2 different times an beat them both,5 years later she died of lung cancer 1998.I my self had skin cancer on my nose they did a small skin graft and I got a new nose 2004, and now Bob I wish the word cancer had never been invented. It is the foulest word I know. Push forward and help her beat this,we will be here when you need us.
David
In a fair Universe, there would be a rule that cancer can't strike a household twice - sort of like the lightening axiom.
This Sunday's comics are mainly all in pink to highlight the scourge of breast cancer. With your special perspective as a cancer patient/survivor, you will be a wonderful caregiver to your wife in this terrible time. Keep the faith
Charm
David - Give Linda my best and let her know she will be in my thoughts and prayers. This cancer thing just sucks!!!! Still dealing with dh's radiation damage, my best friend from high school just finished with breast cancer treatments and now my sis in law was diagnosed last week with colon rectal cancer. You, my friend, will be an excellent caregiver because you know what it's like to go thru this stuff. Charm is right....there oughta be a universal law against this...or a universal law against cancer would suit me just fine
Hang in there.
David she will be a lucky lady to have such a strong and supportive care giver as you.all the luck and love in the world to you both,xx
As Malka stated, they have come far in the treatment of breast Cancer and are having much success treating it. Lets all hope for the best and a cure for her. You have my prayers and best.
Appointment with surgeon who specializes in breast care on wed. Hopefully will get MRI results before then. I'm really thankful she is able to see the surgeon so soon. Let's move on and kick cancer's butt again.
I am sorry very sorry about your wife and will keep you both in my thoughts.
David,
Sorry to hear about your wife having breast cancer. Is it ductal in situ? Is it non-invasive? I had ductal in situ this summer and only needed a lumpectomy as they were able to get clear margins. I hope she has a similar diagnosis. I was stage 0.
Be forwarned that breast MRIs are extremely sensitive and throw a lot of false positives. I had one which led them to do a biopsy on other breast which turned out to be all clear.
Good luck to your wife and keep us posted on her treatment.
Take care,
Eileen
Gosh David, this just sucks....I am so sorry. As DavidCPA said, get her to the best breast cancer center! She can beat this just like you did. Please let her know we are all here to support the both of you.
Hugs,
Shelley
To say this sucks would be an understatement. Just wanted to add my voice to all the people wishing Linda well. And I think you'll be a great caregiver. Your concern and love is so apparent.
Eileen, there is 1 ductal and 1 lobular, both well differentiated and infiltrating. Thank you all for your concern and support.
We saw Linda's surgeon this morning and the news is about the best we could hope for. She will have a lumpectomy and 2 to 4 nodes removed for biopsy, followed by 6 weeks of radiation. Still, she does have cancer and is still upset about that but the surgeon definately lifted our spirits. Her surgery will be next wednsday afternoon.
That is wonderful news David! Give Linda a big hug....
Shelley
That is good news David. Best wishes for the surgery next week.
She has a no doubt got a great caregiver in you this time!!
Love to you both.
Gabriele
David, thanks for the update. I will keep both of you in my prayers.
David,
In the past year plus I have been through 2 employee's "bout" with BC and both have finished Tx and both are doing great.
Hi David,
Someone on this forum sent me this link when I was diagnosed with BC this summer. You might want to check it out.
Have you checked out
http://community.breastcancer.org/Good luck with the surgery. Will be thinking of the two of you.
Take care,
Eileen
After her being your caregiver and you now being hers, I have an idea that she will be fine and that your toughness has given her more fight. Give her my best wishes and prayers.
And have them check her vitamin D level when they do the other blood work. We BC survivors are supposed to have above normal vitamin D levels. Normal is 30. I was at 45. My doc wants me at 60. It's a tiny pill you take once a day.
Take care,
Eileen
Linda's surgery went well today. Sentinal nodes were negative and surgeon says the margins looked good though we won't know for sure until the pathology report in 3-5 days. We are so relieved, but she still has a hard road to go. Radiation should start in about 4 weeks. I sincerely hope that we have seen the last of cancer 'cause, as we all know, "Cancer Sucks". Leave my house and never darken my doorway again.
So glad all went well for Linda today. Hopefully you can get that "c" monster out of your lives once and for all.
So glad surgery went well. Thanks for the update you have and will continue to be in my prayers.
Happy to hear that Linda's surgery went well David.
Hope the pathology also brings good news and the waiting is not too painful.
Gabriele
David,
Add my echo to all the above . I will pray for a good pathology report for Linda and an easy time with the radiation. Neg nodes and clean margins are a double blessing.
In preparation here is some advice I got from the oncology nurse before I started radiation for BC. I hope it helps make life easier for Linda:
1) go braless
2) wear all natural fabrics - I found that cotton JonesNY tshirts wash well with v little shrinkage and hold color well. With a loose shirt/blouse/jacket T shirts can be worn for everything from casual to v dressy and no one noticed - no need for those expensive "BC camofalge clothes." Buy a size larger than normal for comfort.
3) At least twice a day use Medline Remedy skin repair cream (no closer 4 hr b4 radiation) on whole chest area, throat and over sholders to back. If this is hard to find, try a local discount pharmacy or Walgreen's has on line. Even if you have to order more than one tube it is very good for allpurpose use.
4) Do not use regular deoderant, use a crystal type.
5) Wash gently, no very hot shower. I used baby washcloths.
Malka
David - I'm so glad for the good news and hope that it continues to progress so well for Linda and for you. Just seeing these wonderful posts, with such practical suggestions and heartfelt concern expressed, makes me realize more than ever, what a great "family" feel there is to this forum. Like no other for sure!
That is wonderful news David. Give Linda a big hug from all of us here OK!
Shelley
Thanks Malka, I'll pass ypir advice on to her. And I'll have to be careful but will be glad to give her a big hug. My mother and my youngest sister are both bc survivors (Mom had a mascectomy 22 years ago and Sheryl had a double mascectomy with chemo 15 years ago) and were at the hospital with us yesterday. Knowing how much good it does to have people to talk to who have been there and done that, I'm really glad they both live here in Chico. Sheryl brought us some wonderful home made chicken chimichangas and a salad for dinner yesterday eve. Yum.
Glad the surgery went well. Tell Linda we're all thinking about her. Let's hope for clean margins.
Take care,
Eileen
We saw Linda's surgeon this morning. Turns out that the margins weren't all that clear after all. There are what the surgeon called "speckles" of disease in the surrounding tissue. So now, it's a decision whether to try just removing more of the tissue and hope to get it all or to go ahead and do a masectomy and be sure. Not a great day. At least the nodes were confirmed to be clear. I'm leaning towards the "just get it all out" option but there are a few more tests before the final decision.
Linda's breast got infected and one incision won't heal. Going in on tues and if the infection has stopped draining then Dr. will stitch it up. Meanwhile, Linda is just totally depressed and I really don't know how to bring her out of it. I understand, of course, but wish I could get her spirits up. She's a strong person, has to be to be a RN (not to mention living with me) so I know she has it in her to fight this and have told her so but every time I try to say something comforting or ask if she feels any bettter or any such thing she just starts crying. She's also covinced herself that if she has a masectomy that I'll no longer love her. I knew that care givers have a hard job but didn't know how hard. Cancer just plain bloody out and out sucks!
I am so sorry to read the latest. I did not have a carer but I guess there are some days when you just can't get it right no matter what you do.
It does seem to me that Linda is going through normal female type emotions with her cancer.
Hope by Tuesday that things are a little better.
Love to you both
Gabriele
An "oncotype dx" test was run on the tissue that was removed during surgery. This test is supposed to tell how likely recurrence is and how well the cancer will respond to chemo. Linda's score was 13 on a 0-100 scale, meaning recurence is unlikely (about 8%) but also that chemo wouldn't have much success against her cancer. We'll see both the surgeon and the oncologist, who we have not yet seen, during the coming week and then they will put there heads together and figure out the tx plan. More waiting.
David
I'm so sorry to hear Linda is having to deal with so much. My thoughts are with you, Linda and your family.
Karen
This is just so unfair to you both. Sending out warm thoughts your way.
Thinking of you both and wishing you well.
David,
We all know waiting is hard. I'll keep Linda in my prayers.
David....my thoughts and prayers are with you and Linda and I hope they will come up with the right treatment. Sometimes caregivers just can't say anything right but sounds to me like she's just going thru the normal thought process most females would go through. She will work it all out and all you can do is be there and wait it out - harder said than done but do-able.
We are going to meet with Linda's oncologist on monday. Linda knows him from years ago when she worked in oncology at the hospital. He's generally considered number 1 in the region. Meanwhile, she still has a lot of pain and the wound where it got infected looks very nasty. She's trying to cut back her pain meds but I think we all know what happens when you wait to take them, the pain becomes that much more difficult to get under control. Anyway, I guess we won't know until after Thanksgiving what the dr's decide to do.
David, hope Mondays appointment is a good one. Now is not the time to be cutting back on the pain meds. Poor Linda, hope she feels better soon. Prayers to you both
David,
All my best to you and Linda with her appointment Monday and that they can resolve her infection. And I also hope that you both can have a restful Thanksgiving.
David, we hope the infection is showing signs of clearing up and that the next news you get will once again be uplifting to your spirits. Women are surviving BC so often now, including your Mom and Sister, plus Linda had clear nodes, so concentrate on those positive events. We are here for you and your wife all the way. And we join you on the DOWN WITH CANCER bandwagon.
Thursday was one of those rare occasions when both of my sisters, my brother, mother and myself were actually all together for Thanksgiving dinner, along with my brother's in-laws, a few neices and nephews and a brand new grand niece. It was a very good day but as we were leaving Linda said to me " I wish everyone would stop asking me 'How are you doing?'. Reminded me of the "Don't yo just hate it when..." thread on here.
David - How great that you and your family were all together for Thanksgiving! I do hope everything goes well tomorrow with Linda's appointment with the oncologist. I 'm sure she knows how well you understand when those "Don't you just hate it when. . ." comments come along. She has a wonderful support system with you by her side - and we are all here, too - hoping for more positives coming your way.
Linda is now scheduled for a masectomy on 12/16. Get rid of this cancer crap for good. Of course, she's feeling pretty down about it but who can blame her?
Sorry to hear about the upcoming major surgery Linda must go thru. She will get thru this and move on. Hopefully she will be open to seeing what a plastic surgeon can one day do for her. Im sure she would be amazed at the options available if she would want to take it one more step.
Linda is blessed to have such a wonderful and understanding husband by her side thru this ordeal. Happy Holidays to two very special people.
love and hugs to you both David x
Wishing Linda all the best with her upcoming surgery. We are all different, but my reaction to having cancer in my body was "GET IT OUT - AND NOT NOW....BUT RIGHT NOW!!" I hope Linda is feeling the same and in time will reconcile her losses with the "glad its out" feeling.
You have been an awesome caregiver. Wishing you both the best.
Donna
Had one last meeting with surgeon this morning. Thursday is the big day. We really like this surgeon. Pretty much all she does is breast surgery and she knows her stuff. Then went to the boutique that specializes in women who have had breast surgery and got Linda measured for a bra with a prosthesis. She's starting to be a little more upbeat about it but still cries when discussing it with any one. I just remind her that after thursday she will be cancer free and that's what really matters. That and "yes I will still love you without your breast". That one's a little tough for her to get past because as an RN she's seen too many men just get freaked out and refuse to even touch their wives after this surgery. I hope I'm stronger than that.
You sound like a great, caring and compassionate husband. We wish you both the best!
Sharon
Best wishes to Linda for a successful surgery. You are a great husband so dont worry you will get thru this together just like you did with your cancer.
Many prayers coming your way! I am going to send you the address of my friends blog for Linda Via facebook when I get to my computer. She is 31 diagnosed with breast cancer. Opted for a double mastectomy and chemo. She is truly inspiring.
Thinking of you and Linda!
Best wishes for Linda's surgery.
It is great that you have a surgeon that you like and have faith in.
Thinking of you both.
Spent the entire day at the hospital with Linda. My Mom and sister, both breast cancer survivors, came to lend support. I think we all know how much it helps to know others who have gone down that road ahead of you. The surgery went very well and the surgeon is optomistic about recovery. I don't know if I dare say that Linda is cancer free as this is a very devious, sneaky disease and I don't trust it one bit, but I am hopeful that it is so. Now the long process of recovery, physical and emotional.
Glad to hear surgery went well so just take it one day at a time. No declarations required! Hopefully recovery will go smoothly and uneventfully!
Donna
Let's pray for a total cancer free forever recovery.
Congrats on Lindas successful surgery. You are right that it is invaluable to have others like you close by. They are the ones who truely understand the best. A caregiver can understand but its on a different level. Hope Linda is comfortable and has a smooth recovery. Prayers to you both for very long, healthy, and cancer-free futures.
Great that the surgery is behind Linda and was successful.
May the physical and emotional healing go quickly.
Wishing you both a long cancer free life.
Gabriele
Got Linda home from the hospital about 3:00 this pm (it was supposed to be about noon but these things never seem to go on schedule). She's in good spirits, glad to finally have this behind her and the surgeon said that yes, cancer free is an accurate description. Now, if I can just get her to sit and rest abit..
Sounds like so far..so good David but she has to be tired after all she has been through.
Maybe it will kick in soon and she will want to sleep and rest.
So glad to hear that Linda is home. I always do the same thing when I get sprung. I buzz around straightening up and darn it if every single time dont I wear myself out. I hope she is feeling alright and doesnt overdo it. Im sure she will feel much better being home than in the hospital.
Linda's surgeon called last night to tell her that one of the "sentinal nodes" that had been removed during the surgery has tested positive. We meet with her tomorrow and then the tumor board will discuss this on Jan 4. Until then, I really don't know what to think of this.
David, Im sorry to hear this. Im not up on what that means. Best of luck with tomorrow's appointment. Prayers to you both. Please keep us posted.
Sending prayers of strength your way.
We saw the oncologist today and the plan is 4 chemo tx 3 weeks apart follwed by radiation. No node dissection, that's the good news. So as soon as she gets her drain tube removed, hopefully this week, we can schedule the 1st chemo session. I so hope that this will be the end of it.
My thoughts and prayers with both of you.
Sending lots of positive thoughts and prayers to you both!
Hugs,
Shelley
Be strong! Linda is on the right path to being well. Its a long road for anybody who gets cancer. Nobody gets off easily. Best wishes to you both.
Linda starts chemo tomorrow. 4 sessions 3 weeks apart. The beginning of the end for this cancer.
Praying that "eraser" treatment should be the end of this so that you can enjoy many healthy years together.
Praying for both of you, I am sorry to read this. You are both in my thoughts and prayers.
Wishing her cancer GONE real soon.
Love and thinking of both Linda and you.
Gabriele
What a wonderful attitude and statement, "the beginning of the end of this cancer." I am sure that is the way it will be, and pray for a complete recovery for Linda. She's lucky to have you to take care of her. God bless you both.
julieann
Linda's white cell count was down to 1.7 (very low) and she has to have 3 injections of neuprogen (sp?) to bring it back up. The road to victory is never easy.
David, thanks for posting an update. Ive been wondering how you and Linda were making out. Sorry to hear things arent the best. Ive had to get those shots already. They should help to make Linda feel better.
Linda's birthday today and no appointments for either of us. Yippee, a day off.
David:
Isn't it wonderful when you have a day off from the doctors? I think so. That can be one of Linda's Birthday presents
Happy Birthday to Linda.
julieann
So sad to hear,but hang in there they can do alot these days.
Met with Linda's Rad. Oncologist today. Talking about 5 days a week for 5 1/2 weeks, but won't start til chemo is finished. It's so wierd going back to these same places where I had my tx. Had hoped never to see them again. Linda has 2nd round of chemo tommorrow. After the last one her white cell count dropped to 1.7,000 so she had 3 days of nuprogen injections which brought it back up to 11,000. Hope that doesn't happen again.
David, sorry to hear that Linda is continuing on with chemo. Five weeks will go by quickly. Best wishes for easier days ahead!
David,
Sending lots of prayers your way. I'm sorry you are both having to go through this....
Shelley
Linda is going in monday for a scan for possible tumor on her parathyroid. If so then surgery would delay start of radiation. And on we go.
David I was hoping things were going better. Im sorry to hear this. I will continue to pray for Linda. Hoping this test shows nothing is wrong.
Linda's scan showed activity on her parathyroid. The doctors are pretty sure it's not cancer but now they have to decide if surgery is necessary. Meanwhile, today was chemo #3 of 4. 3 weeks from now she'll be finished with chemo, then, if no surgery is required, on with the radiation. If all goes well, we're looking at the middle of june b4 this is over. Hopefully.
1 more chemo to go. An ultra sound has been scheduled for the 21st for the parathyroid. Got everything that can ctross crossed.
Glad to read that there is only 1 Chemo to go for Linda.
I will also keep fingers etc crossed for a good result from the ultra sound David.
Love and best wishes
Gabriele
Crossing fingers and toes etc with you....hope everything goes well! Thoughts, prayers and good energy sent to you both.
Linda goes in for a sonogram of her parathyroid monday. Hopefully things will be clearer after that. Her oncologist says that even if she has surgery it may not delay starting radiation, which is planned to start 1 month after her last chemo, which is this coming friday. I saw my gp yesterday. He asked how the prozac was working for me, if I still had problems with depression. I told him that my wife is battling breast cancer and I've been diagnosed with atrial fibrilation which comes and goes and I don't know if the V.A. will cover the meds that my cardiologist prescribed and, I only have 2 days of the samples he (the cardiologist) gave me left. Naw, no depression here. Oh, that's not even to mention that my step son ( type 1 diabettic since age 9) has been having wild swings of his blood sugar lately. Oy.
David:
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Linda. Hopefully, things will improve - I pray they will
julieann
Will be saying special prayers for your family. Hang in there-you sure have been through hell....
Hey - crossing everything for you and your wife. Hopefully things improve and it's nothing on her parathyroid! Take care and sending many prayers your way!
The sonagram came back negative for cancer on parathyroid (YAY). So an appointment with rad onc. next week and we will hopefully get going on the next phase (5 1/2 weeks of radiation). I'm ready to get off the roller coaster now.
2 RTs down and 26 to go. She already feels sunburned, I guess due to scaes from surgery. I don't think I started to feel the burn for quite a bit later but i didn't have surgery. Also, the position they put her in (arms over head) is very uncovertable because she has had injuries to both shoulders. This is going to be long tough going.
Hang in there David!
Shelley
Best wishes to both Linda and you David.
It does sound like it will be a tough time for the two of you.
There will be and end to Linda's treatment and then to cancer forever.
Thinking of you ...
Gabriele
Linda's starting the 4th week of her 5 1/2 week rt course. She's starting to get a burn going and is tired and cranky (which, of course, I never was). Any way, rounding the final turn and, "DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME".
All the best to Linda - light at the end of the tunnel! Hang in there- both of you!
I wish you both all the best!!! You sound like you have a great attitude and that is so helpful.
Misty
Unfortunately it's an hour by hour struggle to keep a decent attitude. Sometimes I just feel like running down the street screaming. But none of us needs to see that so I keep up my attitude, it's healthier that way.
Hang in there, David. Linda is so lucky to have you. Remember to take care of you and to do things to feed your soul, to comfort your spirit. There isn't a rule that says you have to be strong and stoic 24/7. Be kind and gentle with yourself.
I hope that looking forward brings you and Linda hope and happy memories bring you two great joy to see you through her treatment and recovery. Every day is a step closer, every week is a leap forward.
Keeping you and Linda in my thoughts,
Sandy
3 more! Then there will be 5 "lighter doses " over the scar tissue. Linda is getting badly burned and we know from experience that even after rt ends it keeps cooking for a while longer BUT, we are almost there.
Love the countdown - the smaller the number the better! Thinking of you guys!
Well, that countdown has hit the smallest number it can. 0. Zilch. Nada. No mas. Radiation is complete! Poor Linda is so burned and that's a really hard area to put a dressing on and have it stay but the end is in sight. Already the burned area looks a little smaller. Apptment with oncologist on monday but other than that, no more running hither and yon for a while.
Great news, David! - Now you and Linda can look forward to running hither and yon in beautiful Puerto Vallarta!
At least that it DONE.
Congrats to the both of you.
Congrats Linda!!!! Now let the healing finally begin.
ZERO!!!! YAY!!! Getting to stay put is soooo nice! We had some long trips to all the ENT, MO, and RO appointments...not as many as we WOULD have had...but, it is so nice not to have to be running to appointments all the time! Less stress, less of the 'what time we gotta be there?', less 'let's get our behinds into the car...again' and more time to relax and heal. And, healing is happening inside and outside and all around!
Keep flying above this episode and soon it will be behind you! Here's to distant memories and happy survivors! oh...did I say Yay?!!! YAY!!!!
Fear is always there my love.....you are both legends.....always a bed or 2 in Melbourne for a vacation...woo hoo!!!! Love you both so much...xxxx
Talked to Linda's oncologist thursday. Results are in on her bone scan and there is no sign of cancer anywhere. We sure needed some good news and got it.
That's wonderful News!! So happy for Linda and for you! Yay!!! Now celebrate and go do something fun for the two of you!!
David, thats the best news you could ever get. Congrats!!!! You and Linda have weathered a few rough years. Now its time to finally put it all behind you both and enjoy life again.
Congratulations to you both!
Fantastic news..Congratulations on getting a break at last.
Celebrations are definately in order
Love
Gabriele
Linda's burns have healed up nicely and she has more energy. Her hair is almost long enough to need combing, except for one spot which remains bald. Hope that will grow in eventually. I'm trying to grt her to look at the boutique that carries the bras and stuff for women with mastectomies and see if we can find her a swim suit so we can go swimming at the creek but she's having a hard time still with feeling disfigured. Hopefully time will heal the wounds to her self esteem as it heals the physical wounds. I won't push her on it. Many thanks for all the strength and encouragement we've gotten from you all. You're all awesome.
Tell her that she's beautiful... She got through the cancer and that's definitely celebration worthy. I know that for some women breasts are an integral part of their femininity - but her scars are battle scars - she should wear them with pride. The disease she fought could have stolen a whole lot more... Hugs to you both!
Hi David,
That Linda has a husband who is yearning for his wife to put on a swimsuit so they can go swimming together should bolster her self-esteem considerably. It shows how much she is loved and valued. It shows how much her company means to you. She is a lucky woman.
It's hard to overlook physical scars when they are fresh and still red and visible. As the physical scars fade, the emotional and mental ones will, too. Just by being who you are, you are helping all her wounds heal. It isn't just the physical caregiving that gets someone through. It's also the love and the steadfastness, constancy, unwavering support for the person not just the patient. Linda was a patient, she is now a survivor. Throughout the whole thing, she is a woman. Keep treating her like a woman first and foremost, and she'll regain her self-esteem. You are doing a wonderful job. Keep at it.
I have heard there are wonderful things that are done with reconstruction. A friend of mine had a single radical mastectomy and said the side that was reconstructed using tissue from her abdomen (procedure like a tummy tuck) was better than the original. Those were her exact words. She was very happy about the results. Is that an option for Linda?
I hope Linda doesn't let her thoughts about her body take away things she enjoys doing. Life's too short to let any parts of it get stolen by our insecurities.
Sending a big hug to two of my favorite survivors!
Sandy
It's the way I figure it. If she gets a swim suit with a prosthesis (she has a couple of bras) it's not likely that anyone will really notice and if they do, well it's just proof that she's willing to fight for her life. kind of a "Red Badge of Courage".
You are absolutely on the right track with the way you are figuring it David.
I have read this somewhere and liked it very much as is so true for many of us here;
� My scars are my red badge of courage. I view my scars as a sign of survival and, frankly, I don't care if it isn't pretty. I am very proud of them.�
For me the swimsuit issue is a little different�I only show my body in a women�s only Aqua Aerobics class. Have that normal �extra pounds� female thing going on
Hope you and Linda enjoy your first swim together before you run out of summer over there.
Love to you both
Gabriele
I totally agree... The scar on my arm is a battle scar! Its not a battle I've won yet - but I wear it with pride as it shows I not go down without a fight!
your wife needs to be reminded that anybody whose opinion would matter - already knows about her fight - and those that don't - their opinions are unimportant! She will eventually come to realize this - and yes as sandy said there s reconstruction as a possibility - hugs to you fr being a great hubby -- and her for being strong enough to fight!
Linda got the all clear on her mammogram. Huzzah!
YAAAAY!! Congrats to the both of you! How is she doing by the way?
that is so awesome... so is mexico in your future... im jealous... love mexico... ;o)
Linda is still pretty fatigued and I guess a little PTSD and I have a couple broken ribs but yes we are planning to go to Puerto Vallarta for 2 weeks rught after Thanksgiving. As long as I don't do anything stupid and break any more bones.
That's soooo great it will be just what the dr. ordered!!! She'll get to destress, and you can float in the ocean on an air mattress and heal! Have a great time!!!