Dave, please give yourself a break![and a pat on the back]. You have been through a hell of alot of "real life" the past couple of years. Taking care of 2 family members with cancer is beyond belief! My guess is that you are emotionally worn out and no wonder! I think the best advice I can give you is to schedule a couple of weeks away somewhere, alone maybe, and lie in a hammock and sleep, or ski the mountains or cruise the Carribean. Whatever will allow you to rest and rejuvinate. It's so tough to watch your Mom suffer, but there is nothing you can do to fix that. So take care of yourself, so you will have the energy to take care of her. I am in awe of your strenght through out all of this. Amy