thanks cheryl, he is still a FULL CODE, and the manager at triumph talked to him and tried to explain at this point many patients are not full code.....and he told her "we would be so upset if he did not find till the end"....which we have told him over and over we just do not want him in pain...........



he also tells us if he is choking on his sputum, he wants help of course but if he is dying he does NOT want to be hooked up to a machine....


his last pallative radiation is THURS, than they will reavulate him, then prob he is going to the hospice house 20 minutes away...


the encologist will NOT give us any kind of ball park estimate, but but aunt who went to him literally told the family the NIGHT before to call hospice.....and also my husbands grandpa he said the same thing.......so I know it can be any time..



I just said w him for hours yesterday and watched him sleep as to not disturb him...


when he opened his eyes a minute I said hello and he gave me the biggest smile!! then said "rub my head" which I gladly did as he slept on....

a few hrs later he woke and we had a great visit, he was alert, laughing...and crying. knowing that he will die but he has made peace w that....and he told me how much he loves me and we recalled all of our great memories together..he truly is like my own dad if not more.....we lived w him for 3 yrs when we had our first baby 13 yrs ago at the age of 19, trying to get ahead in life...


he is one of my best friends and it does break my heart...


my husband is w him now and we are doing "shifts" since we have 4 kids and 2 of them are sick right now...


I will keep you all up to date...

thanks for all the kind words