didier, I don't often tell this, or even think about it for that matter, but I have a sister who was raised right along with me, no difference, and she was, from the beginning, a truly horrible person. I once theorized that she was switched at birth at the hospital. There was a startlingly similar situation when I was caring for our mother who was dying, and she flew in, at the request of our dad, and spent all of 15 minutes with her. I can remember how very upset I was at the time. It was not easy, but I eventually completely detached emotionally. You may have to work on doing that, because as I realized, I cannot change another person to be what is acceptable in my world, so I had to let that person go.

In a little pop psychology 101, it may be that your brother resents you for being the "good" son, taking care of your parents. This is not logical, but I am pretty sure that is what was going on in my family. When my dad was terminally ill, she didn't bother to show up at all. Which was probably for the best.

I can empathize with you, didier, and also assure you that time will heal this. I am glad you are not in jail (grin).