Hey there - welcome - sorry you have to be here. Our stories sound very similar - lichen planus - (though they never gave it a name) - location - left lateral underside, age, I too used to be a nurse- And I'm Canadian (from Toronto) and non drinker, non smoker, vegetarian etc...

Most of what everyone here has told you is right - staging and the features of the tumor usually determine they type if surgery etc..- perineural involvement usually indicates the need for a neck dissection. Even if you have no nodes showing on a ct or MRI - cancer generally travels along the path of least resistance. I had no nodes highlight yet my dr removed 40 nodes and found one positive, I had a reconstruction. The plus with having a possible transplant from your thigh is it's only one donor area. My dr. However used the inside of my wrist. He felt my thigh, but because it's usually a thick area (unless you're super skinny) the wrist is the thinnest skin on the body so it fits better in the mouth. So he took from my wrist - not pretty but it worked. No rejection thankfully. In the states the hospital stay is shorter but I was in for 10 days post op (it's less time if there's no reconstruction) the standard here is 10-14.
If they do a neck dissection, and you have a node positive - then the will look for extra capular extension - if you have ECE they may recommend rads and chemo. I you hav any other questions please feel free to pm me... Good luck!