Hi Uhuru, Welcome.

First off, I would like to say - even if it is oral cancer - it doesn't mean you are going to die. But denial is a good shove in that direction if it is cancer because the longer you wait the worst it could get.

It could very well be an infection - or something treatable - but it's been there long enough (5 months) that it's obvious it's not going away on it's own.

I'm sorry you're having financial trouble - I wish I could help by suggesting something - but I'm Canadian so I have no idea what services are available to uninsured people in the states.

I understand your carreer is important to you ( I'm an actor - had similar issues when I was originally diagnosed since my tongue and speech here obviously going to be affected). But your life is more important.

You say you have a child - this is who you should focus on - you want to be around for him/her foremost.

You're worried about getting a definitive diagnosis - afraid of dying, afraid of losing your career, yet you are letting this not knowing rob you living and enjoying your life, and your career, already. Plus not knowing could also kill you.

No one can tell you your not going to die, even the Drs., but if it is oral cancer (a big if since nothing has confirmed it) it can be treated. And the earlier the better.

Get a biopsy done ASAP! Don't wait a month. Don't talk yourself out of it. Biopsies are usually relatively painless, they will take from where they think it is worst - or maybe a few small areas, but unless they are taking large chunks out I can't see where there would be any kind of nerve damage. If it is going to hurt a little they will give you a local.

The lymph node could be anything - a reaction to an infection, or inflammation? But that's another reason you need to get a biopsy done.

If you get an all clear that's great - if you get a cancer diagnosis then at least you know and you can do what you have to do to fight it. Knowledge is power - it is the not knowing that has the potential to kill you.

If you have a close friend or someone who can support you get them to come with you - or talk to them at least sometimes hearing our fears out loud diminishes them a little.

But please get the biopsy as soon as possible.

Best of luck. I am sure someone else here who's American may be able to help with what's available in terms of support for people who are uninsured... Take care.