1st, Linda is improving slowly but surely. Still having low magnesium counts and needs infusion every Monday but otherwise, all docs are pleased with her progress.
So, on Thursday I found out, on facebook of all things, that my 37 year old niece has been diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic melanoma. She is married to a soldier stationed at Ft. Hood who has been to Afghanistan at least twice and they have 2 children. Expecting more details but this looks very bad.
Meanwhile, Linda is bugging me to call my sister or Mom or someone to learn more, but I just haven't been able to do it.I'm not being petty and not calling because no one has called me, (at least I don't think so) I'm just really not ready to face this just when Linda is getting back to health after the year long battle for her life.
And, there is still just too much on our table. We are trying to file for chapter 7 bankrupsy but the lawyer wants $1800.00. If I had that money, I wouldn't need him. We're too broke to go broke. Also, Linda's son, Michael's, behavior continues to spiral out of control and I just can't take much more from him. Now there's this, which may just break the camel's back. I know I have to talk to my family, and soon, but it's just so hard to do and I'm at a loss for words. And now I'm at a loss for further words here. Please, I know we've been bending God's ear an awful lot lately but please keep Karen and her family in mind and heart.

David, I can certainly understand you not wanting to deal with more right now. You haven't had a respite for so long.

Just curious but can you still keep up with your niece without needing to speak with the family right away? When it's time to call, you will know.

Continued prayers for you and Linda. I'm glad she is improving.

David - First of all, I'm really glad Linda is improving. You both have been through more than most people can bear and still be able to function. You mentioned you were "expecting more details" re your niece - so I would think it would be better to wait until you find out more before contacting anyone in the family. FB may not always convey accurate information. You are such a very caring person, but the first person you must care about is yourself and if all these stresses get out of control you won't be good for anyone else. You have always been such a great caregiver for Linda and to continue to do so means you need to make sure your own stress level is manageable so that you can stay healthy enough to handle whatever else comes your way. Wow! I'm blown away by the fee charged for bankruptcy! My son went through bankruptcy but he couldn't afford a lawyer in the first place. Somehow he made it through and survived. David, you can just do so much. Time to get some outside (or inside) help for yourself. I've been following your experiences for a long time and there was a time when Michael was helpful to you and Linda. . . . Maybe he could be pressed into service again and help in some way? Sure hope better days are coming for you soon. Sending positive vibes and prayers your way.

Im very sorry to hear about your niece! Wishing all your family the very best with everything. I know you have been thru so much yourself and then dealt with Linda's illness too.

Best wishes with everything.

Michael is physically very helpful with taking care of Lind's ostomy appliance changes and keeping track of her meds but the stress and psychological misery he causes is not really worth it. I would really rather just bumble through it without his help, even through he is better at changing the ostomy than I am. I will see my Mom today (Mother's day) so she will no doubt know more about Karen.
There is really no one I can talk to about all this, though I did have a good talk with Mom about a week ago but she has plenty of burdens without me laying mine on her. Mom. btw, is coming up on her 89th b-day in a few weeks, but anyway, this is my main outlet for getting crap off my chest so thank you all for bearing with me. Love you all.

It has been a good week so far. 1st, took Linda to infusion center for her weekly elecrolytes test, which has required an infusion of magnesium every week so far. Not this time. It was right at the point below which she needs the infusion so we were in and out of there in little more than an hour rather than the usual 4-5 hours.
2nd, my niece Karen went to the oncologist yesterday and the stage 4 melanoma with mets to liver is no such thing. Benign tumor. Huge sigh of relief but at the same time a bit miffed (just a bit) at the doc who did the original dx. Quack.

Whew. Really great news re your niece. Yep, I too would be rather peeved. Where did that diagnosis come from? Who was the pathologist who studied the biopsy? However such a relief for you all. Fabulous news.
Tammy

I agree with Tammy, great news on your niece. Not so bad with Linda, as well. I'm glad the visit was shorter and she is starting to balance her electrolytes. That's huge, too!

Best wishes for some smooth sailing, David. For you, Linda and your niece!

That's terrific

That's great news, David!

What a relief to know that your niece was mis-diagnosed. Hopefully things are looking up for you.