i'm off to a cancer walk today with the local support group that i attended. many friends in the group didn't make it, but some of us are still here. this is my first time, so it brings back emotions that were somewhat removed as i've been out of the group for about 9 months. the entire support group agreed upon the name 'Kancer Kickers' that was suggested by Jim. Jim won't be there today.

it's a warm day with no rain... around the local zoo & park. i think i'll hang out with the strollers, not the serious walkers.

who else has been to a cancer walk and what were your experiences?

cu,
larryb

I will be participating in our Walk for Life this June. It will be my first one as well. The Foundation has turned this into a weekend event for the whole family with entertainment etc. The first night is the Survivors Walk followed by the lighting of the Luminaries around the track. Anyone can purchase a Luminary in memory of someone who has lost the battle or who is fighting the battle or survived the battle.
I helped with the Daffodil Sale this year and enjoyed that very much. We managed to raise $31,687.00 to be used for Research, Public Education Programs and Patient Services. I hope we will do as well with the sale of the Luminaries. I should add that this money was raised between 2 small cities in the South East part of the Province. The total population combined is about 16,000 people.
Like Larry I'd love to hear about others doing the same thing and your experiences.
David

Larry,

I am truly sorry your friend Jim won't be walking with you. I can't imagine how emotional that time will be for you. Sending kind thoughts and lots of love your way.

I have participated in the Relay for Life here since my mother came here to live in 2000. I always shed a tear or two when the survivors get their special lap. Never would I have imagined being in that group. I have also purchased luminaries as David says for close friends and families who pass that year. It is so sad that every year for a while now I have had someone close succumb to cancer.

Ed

we don't have similar walks here in the UK..we have fund raising runs for research.. but yes we all walk with the shadows of our friends at our shoulder.. we send man into space but we can't get to grips with cancer...
Helen

Even in my small town, we have the Relay for Life, which goes for an entire weekend at a local high school track. I ran last year and will do so again this year. Weird, but I skipped the survivor lap because although I am, that is not how I identify myself. I am runner who USED to have cancer. My friends know, but I have always kept my business to myself, so I am not comfortable being part of the survivor group. Except here (grin). I highly recommend looking for a Relay for Life in your area. Lots of fun for a good cause.

I have been asked to speak at our local Relay for Life event on May 15th about my experience as a caregiver. They have one survivor and one caregiver speak. This event runs from noon Sat to noon Sun and also has the survivor lap, lighting of the luminaries and other fun things going on. This is my first time for participating in this type of event. I hope I can do my 5-10 minute speech without breaking down. I have my doubts since it has only been 7 months and I'm still very emotional, but they don't have anyone else. They had a patient/caregiver team lined up to talk, but the patient just learned that she has to undergo chemo again so they both bowed out.

I'm not too sure yet what I am going to say. They bill this event as uplifting and a celebration of life after cancer. I told them Heather didn't suvive and I don't know how uplifting that is going to be, but I'll try. They want me to talk about how cancer affected the family, so I figure I can talk some about Heather's daughter Cati. Since she is doing so well, that may be encouraging for patients who have young children. I also plan to tell of how it brought some old friends back into our lives when they offered their support. Since we cared for Heather at home, I thought I could let people know that home care can be done by ordinary people. I figure if I could do it with no medical background, that may inspire other people to try also.

I am open to suggestions on what to say. Maybe some of you that have attended these events can remember what speeches you've heard and give me some tips. I haven't spoken in public for many, many years and can use all the help I can get!!! Thanks!

Rainbows & hugs,
Rosie

Rosie
Go tell them lady... I don't think you know how much your common sense and caring means to us on this forum.. sometimes here it's what you DON'T say that is important.. when I'm down I set great store by your posts... so for Heather and for us go WOW them..
love and hugs
Helen

Rosie: All of the things you mentioned are perfect for the speach you described. Just the kind of thing everyone there is likely to be interested in hearing. Only thing you might consider adding is the importance of a positive attitude as the battle is being fought. Regards, Kirk Georgia

Oh yes, Rosie, definitely incorporate Kirk's suggestion about a positive attitude being important, for both the caregiver and the patient. I wish I could hear your address, as I am sure it will be absolutely terrific!

Rosie,

You have already put into words exactly the message you want to relay and it is a beautiful one at that. Remember, the entire circle of family and friends gets the disease, not just the patient. I am sure Cati will be an inspiration to all of them just like she (and you) are to us. As I read your post I reminisced about my mother being here and reuniting her with a friend she hadn't seen for 50 years and how much love she enjoyed throughout her life. I know you will do an excellent job and if it gets emotional for you just listen in the background with all of us cheering you on...you go girl! You are certainly entitled to get emotional with all you have had to endure and live through. Remember we all love you and are standing behind you with our hands rested on your shoulder to give you all the support you need to deliver the message everyone should have the honor of hearing.

Ed

Rosie,
Glad you are speaking! You have inspired so many of us here on the board by what you have gone through and how helpful you were to Heather. I would definitely talk alot about Cati and how well she is doing. That alone will be such inspiration to others. You always speak from your heart and that will get you a good speach for this occasion. My prayers will be with you!
May 15th is my son's birthday, so I won't forget to pray for you!
Debbie

Rosie, Good for You!!!! Thanks for speaking...I will be thinking of you and praying for you on May 15th! We have a Relay For Life Walk here on May 21st, I was invited to walk in the survivor's lap and I plan on doing that! So grateful that I can!!! God Bless You!!!!!!!!!!! Carol

My husband (my caregiver) and I sponsored a team last year to celebrate my one year survivor anniversary. It was the first time I had been at a Relay and didn't really know what to expect. It ended up being a very inspiring and awesome adventure for my whole family and the people I work with that came to join my team I was a little embarrassed to do the survivor walk, but as you are walking with other people who have survived hearing that word "cancer"and the teatments they have endured, it gives you an emotional high that continues for the whole Relay! The luminaries stay lite through the early morning hours and you realize how many lives are touched by this disease. All should try to attend and support!! Rosie, your sharing your experiences helps share the message that cancer touches more lives than just the patients. The families and caregivers should walk the survivors walk, too. As we certainly can't make the journey without you! My prayers are with you! - Kris

Thanks for all the suggestions and support. I think some of you have more confidence in me than I do, but I will certainly give it my best shot. Best wishes to all who will be participating in the Relay for Life and other walks and events this year. Hats off to you all!

Rainbows & hugs,
Rosie

Rosie, now we know you can do it. You`re going to be keeping Heather`s memory alive and helping folks too. Just letting non professionals that home care is possible, you proved that ! I truly believe that our loved ones have left us behind to continue the fight, they were so brave and we are too!!!!! Love and Hugs, Dee

Rosie,
I have every confidence that you will know what to say and how to say it. It will be from your heart, and there is more than enough heart there to take care of the largest crowd.

Rosie, if I could get there to hear you speak I would. You are Heather's voice now and the world needs to hear. Good luck with it.
Love,
Minnie

Rosie:

You don't need to be uplifting because dealing wth cancer is damn hard-just be the you we all know and love here at OCF. Remember the "rainbows and hugs" part which I think is your trademark. Share your soul and Heather's and when you give your talk and you will make a meaningful difference.

K-

larryb-

I had a Relay for Life team this past February. It was the most awesome experience of my life! My husband is the survivor and we were just so overwhelmed with such joy and love by the 30...that's right THIRTY...friends and family members that joined our team. Our team raised over $5,500. We both plan on making this event a yearly thing...and my husband plans of being around as a survivor for many years to come. This year he was only able to walk the Suvivor's Lap...since he was just out of treatment...but next year he plans of walking many laps during the 24hr event. I learned and experienced the most love, support, and hope by being the chairperson for the "Survivor Booth" in addition to being a Team Captain. I wouldn't trade this experience for the world. No, I wouldn't wish cancer on anyone, but I must tell you the experience of Relay has been the "blessing in disguise" for my husband and me. I hope you had a great walk and will continue to walk whenever you can to support cancer research and to celebrate being a SURVIVOR.

Rosie-

As a caregiver I just want to say...just speak from your heart...the words will come and they will be PERFECT! You are the blessing in the lives of many and the angel that you are will shine through! Relax and remember everyone at a Relay event has been touched by cancer in one form or another...so they ARE your family...and will LOVE what you have to share.


Lorie

--------------------------------------------------
husband diagnosed with tonsil cancer 8/03, left side, stage III, 7weeks chemo/radiation. Cancer free since 12/03.

Lorie,

Thank you for the words of wisdom and inspiration!

Ed

I went to a Relay for Life tonight in Rockwall, Texas. The sponsoring business had kicked in $29,000 before any other monies were tallied! The survivor lap consisted of 391 years of survival, plus my 7 months. It was quite an emotional moment for me and very humbling to see people lined up on the sides cheering on the survivors.

I came across a website this week www.thecancermonument.org and was intrigued. Interestingly enough, they are trying to construct a cancer monument near where I live and were also at the Relay for Life I attended. I thought is was an interesting idea thought up by a cancer survivor that has been battling non-Hodgkins Lymphoma for the past 4 years. She is trying to educate people on the importance of early detection for oral cancers.

Ed

I participated in my second Relay for Life this weekend. Last year I was part of a large corporate team; this year I organized a smaller team from our church in the name of someone we know who has been going through treatments for oral cancer.

The survivors' lap and the luminaria ceremony were especially moving. As I started doing laps, I was checking first for all the names our team had submitted for candles, but after that, I started seeing more and more names that I recognized (friends, neighbors, former co-workers) who had also had to deal with cancer in one form or another. I did my last several laps with a friend who was having the same "name-recognition" experience and we were sharing our stories.

Cathy

Our Relay for Life event is next weekend. I have been on a team for the past three years, but this year my 13 year old daughter and several of her friends (some whose parents have had cancer)have formed their own team. They have had car washes, babysat, and sold magnets to raise money. I think it is a great way for children/teenagers to help deal with their feelings and to feel they are helping in the fight. I remember when my husband was going through radiation and we drove home for the weekend to see the kids; the relay was one weekend and I went and brought my kids. My husband was too weak to walk the survivor lap, but my kids and I walked the caregiver lap (usually the lap after the survivor lap). It was very emotional for all of us, especially when we saw his name on several bags people in our small town had done.
If you have never been to a Relay for Life event, I would encourage you to go. It is a great community event that not only raises money for cancer, but awareness as well.

I attended the Relay for Life in my area last Friday night. It was a very moving experience. I am a heart on my sleeve kind of gal, and it was a real effort for me to take that first survivor lap with all the people surrounding the track clapping for us. I did great until I rounded the last curve and saw my family standing up and crying and clapping for me! The luminaria ceremony was also special as they read the names of survivors (In Honor of...) and those who have passed on (In Memory of...) I had purchased luminarias for several of our board members, and it was so special to hear your names read aloud! It felt like you were there with me.

Something that truly disappointed me in the event was the minimal mention of oral cancer in any of the materials passed out. Lots of research and progress in areas of breast cancer and lung cancer, but no mention at all of oral cancer except for the address of SPOHN in a support group section of a pamphlet. That is just not right!

I hadn't planned to attend the gathering in Las Vegas, but my husband and I are now making arrangements to be there. We need to get the word out.

Viva Las Vegas!
Sincerely,
Lisa in Ks

Amen, Lisa!
I am SO glad you and your husband will be here in September!
Your walk brought tears to my eyes.
Love and God bless,
Judy U

Lisa,

I saw a lot of survivors cheering as the crowd was cheering but my reaction was the same as yours. It was a very humbling and emotional time for my wife and me. I attended the Relay for Life in 2000 when my mother was terminal with ovarian cancer; I attended in 2001 after she passed away and a good friend was terminal with bone cancer; I attended in 2002 while going through the Hep C treatment but was too tired to stay all night; I did not attended in 2003 but did make it as a survivor in 2004. I guess I'm on the roll this century and can't stop now!

Rock Chalk Jayhawks! See ya in Vegas!

Ed

Lisa,

I agree it is so disheartening to realize that even the American Cancer Society staff and volunteers don't know much about oral cancer. I am happy to say that there are a few more people in my area that are now a bit more informed.

The night I was to give the talk at the Relay, we got rained out. Actually "lightninged" out because rain alone doesn't deter them. We stood there for a couple hours counting between the flashes and finally gave up and scheduled the ceremony for the next morning.

While waiting, I talked with many of the volunteers and one staff member. Because of their questions and interest in Heather's case and their obvious lack of oral cancer facts, I went home and rewrote much of my speech. The other speaker couldn't make it the next morning, so I took advantage of the extra time.

I was afraid I would break down and not be able to finish. I did almost lose it a few times, but was able to go on. The worst thing was that I had taken a picture of Heather and Cati to show at the beginning of the speech. But I had a microphone in one hand and my notes in the other, so one of the volunteers offered to hold the picture. She held it through the entire speech, which was fine, except that she kept sniffling. The more I heard her cry, the more I felt myself starting to do the same. So I was trying to surreptitiously move far enough away so I couldn't hear her. At the same time, I'm trying to remember my speech. I had rehearsed the previous week, but since I added stuff at the last minute, I made notes so I could keep on track. But there was no podium to lay anything down and the mike was so fat, I had trouble holding it and turning the pages at the same time. It was a sight to see!

I know Heather's story made an impact, though, because when I was done and went to where several of the volunteers were sitting, everyone was in tears. Thank goodness I wasn't close enough to hear them while speaking or I would have lost it for sure!

Since I stressed how helpful OCF was, I have now been asked to write a small piece for the ACS's local newsletter about OCF. I gave them an info card and a lady who is an employee of a dental company asked for a card also. So at least a few people are more aware of oral cancer now. Brian, maybe I should ask what you want written for the newsletter. Or maybe you already have a small piece written that would be appropriate. Can you tell I need help?!? LOL!

This Relay was actually in a neighboring county, so I'm going to attend my county's Relay at the end of June, so I can compare speeches and see how badly I did! LOL!

Well, enough gibberish for now. I haven't been on the forum much lately, so I need to catch up on all the news. I will see you all in Vegas, though!

Rainbows & hugs,
Rosie

Well Rosie
I knew you would 'do good'lady.. I thank you for your continued effort on 'my' behalf.. you always are prepared to go 'that extra mile' yes oral cancer needs to be brought to the front.. and when I say I have oral cancer.. everyone goes quiet and dissapears.. so SHOUT loud for Heather and for us..God Bless You Rosie.. may peace be yours someday..
Sunshine.. love and hugs
Helen

Yes, God bless you, Rosie! I am so proud and honored to know you and thank you from the bottom of my heart for spreading the word. Each time you mention breaking down and tears, my eyes well up and I feel some of your pain. I would take it all to give you one day of peace and comfort. May God continue to hold you in his healing and comforting hands.

Ed

Rosie and Ed,

My eyes well up too. Rosie you are truly a wonderful woman and you are always in my prayers.

Love,
Dani