Hi, Last week a friend of ours who had had ovarian cancer 10 years ago found out she has liver and kidney cancer. They told her they would do all they can for her but she has 2 years tops to live. The gal up the street had breast cancer and surgery, radiation and chemo. They told her because of that 10 years was what she could expect.She said Bull. Who are they to tell me if my cancer does not come back I will only live 10 years. I do not understand. I was treated out of my area because of my cancer being oral, and I was only given positive reactions from Doctors. When I brought up %'s was told that all cases different and not to dwell on that.I can see telling someone that has 6 months to a year so they can take care of things that need done, but to project death after a year seems crazy. Anything can happen with treatment. A person thinking positive helps them heal faster and maybe has a good part to do with overall health.Am I missing something here?Do people want a guess on lifespan? I am confused and it's hard to know what to say to these people.

The reseachers have to have yardsticks to determine whether or not a treatment is efficacious. This sometime spills over and people like to play with numbers. You are absolutely right, unless you are terminal and must take care of things, there is no reason to speculate on a persons potential date of death. Life is a terminal illness - no one gets out alive. If you don't stay in the "now" the future will drive you crazy. What a disservice that doctor did to your neighbor -what an insensitive jerk. Doctors like that have to make you feel good about malpractice lawsuits...

I can't get over the insensitivity of some of these doctors! They seem to get so engrossed in their own detachment that they forget who they are talking to. Yes....they can't become emotionally involved in each case for self-preservation, but, patients, not educated as themselves, need comfort, NOT numbers!

When my husband was diagnosed and given the odds, believe me, there were times when I lay awake at night, listening to his breathing, knowing he wouldn't make it to morning. Sixteen months out and still listening..WRONG!!!!

My mother, on the other hand, I totally disregarded the information that the doctors were giving me. They were puzzled and only had an educated guess as to her condition. She presented with nothing more than blood in her urine. She was alert, walking, eating, laughing until the last 12 hours of her admission. (Twelve days total) It was only when the nurses wavered that I knew I was dealing with reality. Maybe this is one reason why nurses are so special. They tend to give the "odds" more gently when the time is near.

I'm sorry. I know I have regressed.

Just don't put your faith in all the studies, the odds, the doctor's, so called, experience. We are all individuals leading different lives. Our paths were made differently, and nobody, not even ourselves, know where they lead.

Love,
Mandi