| Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 2,606 Likes: 2 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 2,606 Likes: 2 | I am so sorry to hear about your father. I can only hope your pain becomes more bearable with time. Your dad knows you were there with him for the entire journey. Sometimes that is enough...or at least all we can do.
SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0 Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03 Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08. Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11 Cervical Myelitis 09/12 Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12 Dysautonomia 11/12 Hospice care 09/12-01/13. COPD 01/14 Intermittent CHF 6/15 Feeding tube NPO 03/16 VFI 12/2016 ORN 12/2017 Cardiac Event 06/2018 Bilateral VFI 01/2021 Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022 Bilateral VFI 05/2022 Total Laryngectomy 01/2023
| | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | Im very sorry for your loss. It sounds like your father did very well handling the treatments. Losing a parent is never easy. I do understand what you are going thru, I lost both of my parents many years ago. Try to think about happier times and let those memories help you to remember your father before he was sick. Take time to grieve and try to remember to be good to yourself. ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive | | | | Joined: Mar 2011 Posts: 1,024 "OCF Kiwi Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF Kiwi Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Mar 2011 Posts: 1,024 | Oh Kaykay, life just is not fair. I really do feel your pain. I don't know that you will ever get answers to all your questions. I think that you just have to treasure the memories. Think of all the good times you had together and of all the love you shared. Know that he fought hard. You all did your very best to get him a good quality of life and to keep him with you. it just wasn't to be. I pray you find the strength to get through these very difficult weeks and months. Tammy
Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT. PET 6/11 clear. R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in. March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!
| | | | Joined: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,671 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,671 | Oh Kaykay - I'm so sorry to hear of your Dad's passing. There is never enough time when we lose someone close to us. I'm sure your Dad felt the love and the tender moments you had with him as he fought so hard to make it through this tremendous challenge. Just know that his love is still surrounding you and helping you now, as you make it through these sad days and moments.
Anne-Marie CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)
| | | | Joined: Dec 2010 Posts: 5,260 Likes: 3 "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Dec 2010 Posts: 5,260 Likes: 3 | I am so sorry for your loss. I recently lost my father so I have an inkling of what you are going through. Much love hand hugs to you during this difficult time. It is never easy to lose a loved one.
Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
| | | | Joined: Jan 2013 Posts: 15 "OCF Down Under" Member | OP "OCF Down Under" Member Joined: Jan 2013 Posts: 15 | the last 4 weeks have been very buisy,we've had alot of firsts,mothers day, first trip to a family holiday shack without dad,1st granddaughters 21st which dad had set as a date he wanted to be able to eat something and have a beer and generally feel well enough to enjoy the day,first stay at mums with out dad being there,i know there are plenty more to come and that each will be as hard as the other,this is the first wkend that we have nothing on and im not looking forward to it,keeping buisy seems to have helped,its the quiet times at night that my mind turns to dad,dont want a whole wkend of quiet !lm still struggling to come to terms with the reality of it all,l do know one thing for sure, so far it hasnt got easier its got harder, the crying just starts up anywhere any time and i cant stop it...i can hear him and see him like it was only yesterday ,l just cant get my head around the fact that i wont see him again, i honestly dont know how to go on with out him in my life...it trueley sux !!!! | | | | Joined: Dec 2010 Posts: 5,260 Likes: 3 "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Dec 2010 Posts: 5,260 Likes: 3 | Sorry for your loss, it does eventually get easier but you do have to allow yourself to grieve. Try to remember the good times. I lost my dad in March, it was heart breaking but he was suffering and unhappy. I love him, and miss him, but try to remember the good times with him. hugs, love and peace to you.
Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
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