Thank you for these posts. It is nice to know that I am not the only one who panics over a sinus infection. Kelley did it all turn out ok?

And thanks Eric for your words of wisdom.

Can I say without being preachy that I give over my fears to God who immediately exchanges them for peace of mind and heart. I haven't been truly afraid since I heard Him say "trust me" and I obeyed.

My bouts of fear/uncertainty are less and less frequent, though are still intense when they take hold. I reckon as time goes on they'll be a rarity.

Your approach seems solid Eric...
...And quoting Yoda - is that an OCF first?
FIrst i've seen anyway.
Awesome.

Its like a railway train. For the most part I'm feeling great and doing well but every once in a while - something will happen (usually a scan or a check up) then its like a train comes along and mows you down, I think for me its a trust issue. I question everything because frankly I don't want to be caught dropping the ball. I know my drs are good, but I'm not comfortable with my radiologists attitude, and my surgeon, is fantastic, but he's not my primary - they tag team me. ergh!! So I do think eventually it will subside but right now 6 mos out its still too fresh!

I did a search Jon, yes it was the first Yoda quote ever used on OCF. I've used it twice on these forums altogether although such wisdom should be in daily affirmations...Just ask Stewart Smalley.

Sorry, I'm a movie and TV buff.

Cheryl, I think you're doing an amazing job at coping being 6 months out. In my opinion the emotional healing part of this experience is the most difficult to get through. Our Dr's focus on the physiology of it all and it's the mental game most of us struggle with, which is why this support group is so important. Knowing the people on these forums understand the road I've taken and can relate to my physical and emotional issues post cancer gives me strength daily and for that I'm grateful.

[quote=EricS] Our Dr's focus on the physiology of it all and it's the mental game most of us struggle with, which is why this support group is so important. [/quote]

You hit the nail on the head Eric

Did the ENT think that the scope down Alex's throat somehow turned his hearing off? Did he not realise the panic he caused even mentioning a "second primary" or "recurrence of the first" in our presence?

Every lump, bump, spot, cough, spit, choke or infection that would otherwise have been completely unnoticed is now reason to "churn" and wonder if this warrants a visit to the doctor, a push for a PET, a biopsy etc etc etc ...

Add to that, Post Traumatic Stress and the depression and irritability that comes with it that needs managing or else it interferes with recovery. And lets not forget the stress and anxiety about having no money because of job loss and the prospect of rejoining the work force with impaired speech, inability to eat and fatigue.

The rose coloured glasses slip a bit on occasion and we Carers are not immune either. Without this forum, those glasses would be broken by now

Q. Does the fear/anxiety ever subside
A. Nope. You just learn to deal with it better or else get professional help. (see my thread on psycho-oncology)

Of course, the OCF forum is one of the best ways to deal with it.

Keep the Faith
Charm

Hey thanks Eric for your kindness and klo! You guys are amazing... Picking my self up this morning and bopping off to yoga! I need some centering and focus! Hugs!!! Have a fantastic weekend... Now if only i could get the train track marks off my back I'd be awesome

Part of the "new normal" of the post cancer adventure is the fear of recurrence. Like others have said it slowly tapers off the longer you survive but it can come roaring back at any time. Whenever I get a sore throat or ear infection I feel the fear come back.