Hi ...I am a 37 year old that found out on June 12th that I had tongue Cancer. I feel like my life has been a whirlwind ever since! I never thought that I could get the "C" word....I really haven't had time to wrap my head around anything! On July 2 I found myself in the hospital preparing for a glossectomy (which thankfully only consisted of them removing a portion of the tongue) and a modified radical neck dissection on the left side. All of the words...I find it hard to believe they are in my vocabulary!

You talk about scared...I have never felt so afraid and alone in my entire life....even though in the waiting room sat my most faithful and wonderful boyfriend, my mom, dad, step mom and my very best friend from high school! Still as I sit typing I find it hard to believe! I even have to stop and just cry....huh cry...I just don't think I have done enough of this! While on the phone the other day with a teacher friend of mine I actually said ..."can you believe I had cancer this summer"...can I said had or do I need to say have...don't know!

Needless to say...I survived the dissection (who came up with the name for this procedure anyway...I hadn't used the word dissection since high school and I seem to remember there was a frog involved in that!!!) and the glossectomy! They removed 39 lymph nodes and I am ever so thankful to report that none of them had any signs of cancer! AND my tongue showed clear margins of the portion they removed. So what do I do now, do I freak out every time I see something strange on my tongue....YES!

Just today I made an emergency appoinment with my doctor because I just knew it had returned! He just rubbed my arm and told me it was simply the stitches dissolving and that I was recovering beautifully. But, I know, But, it feels, But, its nothing?

My question is this....does that feeling ever go away, that at any second the other ball will drop and I will be back in that same god awful scarey world? Does it ever get any easier....I feel like I haven't taken a deep breath in months....will I ever be able to relax and feel normal again?

I know it has been a short time but I am just feeling so lost...I feel like this is not real....

Thanks for reading and any insight you can provide me with will be greatly appreciated!
Kerri M
Tongue Cancer Stage 2 (hopefully gone and never to return)

Two months after surgery I have the same apprehensions. I think I burnt my mouth yesterdeay with hot coffee. When I got home and looked there was a big ol ugly blister there that resembled what my cancer looked like. The radiologist said he thought it was not cancer but scheduled me to have it looked at tomoorrow.

Today, by the way being my first rad treatment of 30.
Afterwards I was just too tired to worry about.

Oh... I.m new and short on experience... but those that know will share what they have here.

I hope everthing goes well for you tomorrow. I can not tell you how many times I have bit my tongue or burnt my tongue over the past 4 weeks...I am just ready to have my tongue just simply be a tongue again.
Thank you for your kind words! It appears you are caught up in the same whirlwind I am in.

Hi Kerri,

I'm a 4 year plus survivor of the same treatment you had. Yes, it can be done.

Will the fear of a recurrence ever go away? Probably not, but it does get easier.

Yes, you did "have" cancer and you are now cancer free, as I like to say. You can call yourself a "survivor".

If you want to ask me some questions off the forum, just send me a PM or an email. Click on my screen name and then profile. The links are there.

Jerry

Kerri, welcome to OCf. Sounds like your cancer was taken care of very quickly, which is good. The fear of a recurrance is something we all live with. Im sure with time, it wont be as big of a fear to you.

You are very fortunate to have had surgery to remove the cancer. Most of us have also done radiation, with or without chemo. Take comfort in knowing you have those options if your cancer would ever return.

The emotional support of OCf will help to ease your mind. This site is made up of the most caring and intelligent patients and their caregivers. Best of luck with your continued healing and recovery.

Kerri, you are feeling the same as most of us have.....and continue to feel. I must have cried gallons the first months....and I went to one dr. or another at the least suggestion that something might have been wrong. They were very patient with me and said not to ever hesitate to come.....You need their assurance, so GO. They understand. I'm glad you got such a good report. Stay alert, but try to take your mind off of it. Time will help! XO

Kerri, welcome to our home, and actually to me this does feel like my home. Everyone here I consider family. You are having the feelings most have and are having the same questions go thru you mind. I had the same procedures you did 2 yeras ago on the 3rd of August 2007. My tongue still hurts a lot , but I also had to have my teeth removed and radiastion seed implants put in my tongue and put into an induced coma as I was radioactive for a few days. I had the radiation and chemo both and was treated very agressively these before the implants. Yes your mouth will hurt and you will have worries, but it's best to do your best to ignore these things unless it really gets bad and you actually can see something or feel it. Imagination runs rampant with OC. It's our life and we want to keep it. Good luck and be brave.

Kerri,

I am 3 years out and yeas the further you get away from C day the less you think about it but I'm sure the C word will never loose it's grip on us entirely.

I think this is nl apprehension after going through this. having a cancer diagnosis is scary, especially one like oral/tongue cancer which doesn't seem to have alot of younger people out there with it. We felt so alone with this cancer since we didn't know anyone with it and nobody seemed to know anybody else with it. My husband and I were nervous wrecks for the first few months after surgery and went back for several checks on swollen neck, hoarseness, swollen cheek. All were checked and abated within a day and gradually with their reassurance we are beginning to be less anxious. I feel reassured that my husband has a video fiber optic scan of his tongue and pharynx every month I know I watch my husband like a hawk and question every cough ,sneeze, nap sessions but i'm trying to let it go and enjoy today and enjoy that we survived this past year

Hope all goes well for you with radiation, eat well now, get your self buffed up nutritionally with lots of protein and smoothies. You might want to try getting Magic Bullet(I don't work for them) a small food processer which makes great easy nutritious drinks.
My husband had 2 every day, I usually used vanilla yogurt, milk, ice cream, whey protein powder, bananas, blueberries, strawberries. etc. Towards the end of treatment the blueberries seemed to bother his throat. After week three, he still needed the feeding tube inserted but continued with his shakes. What do they recommend for skin care during your treatments? Good luck, will be thinking of you