Pat,
It looks like you have a good start here with just taking the time to put your feelings out there for others to see. This is what helped me so very much during my husband's treatments. Many of my posts were "anger driven" and I spent a lot of time venting online. Now I keep a journal. I write in it often, but not daily. I find the good stuff as well as the bad stuff to write down. One day my boss's shrink called to re-schedule an appointment and she (the shrink) asked how I was doing. I just laughed and said "you should have seen my journal this morning".
I also found a distant friend to talk to and email. I needed someone who was very much removed from the closeness of family so that I could really say what I felt without having to worry about somebody else's feelings.
I haven't posted in a while because my recent anger has been quite overwhelming and I wanted to get it under control before going on a 10 page online rant, but I wanted to let you know that your Post was really a great way to help deal. Don't be afraid to keep ranting. There are plenty of us out here that do the same.

Karen