Hi PAt,
Hang on. I kept positive, but exhaustion and helplessness got to me. I felt like nothing I did eased any of martin's pain, but i know now it did (he told me later). It's so tough but you need to keep strong.
I had a colleague I went for coffee with everytime I was at work around lunchtime, and friends to winge at. And I must say this board was a life saver. And my family in France called almost every day.
What got to me one day was that every one kept asking how Martin was, and at that point I was so tired looking after Martin and holding down a job, that I thought "how about me, no one asks how I am!". But I keot quiet I wasn't sick and i felt bad just thinking that at the time. But it's normal.
As everyone else here said take some time out, even if it is having a cup of tea in the garden, look at the flowers, talk to a friend, and come here and talk smile
All the best.
cecilia


Girlfriend to Martin 49 years old at diagnosis
Diagnosed with SCC unknown primary June 2008.
Cancer found in single node Stage N2A (3 to 6cm).
Tonsilectomy 16th june, Radical modified neck dissection left side 30th june.
30 TX radiotherapy ended 9th October
First comparative study scan came back clear