Feelings come and feeling go, sometimes they stay awhile sometimes they go quickly. Sometimes I can eat sometimes I can't, sometimes I can sleep sometimes I can't. Sometimes I have I have hope and sometimes I think death. I am all over the board up and down. I feel like I need to know how to feel, but I just can't get a handle on it. I want to do everything to help him, I want to be good. But sometimes I feel like I am just a bad person when I want to say oh dear not again. I can't live with myself sometimes, he has emotions I don't know how to deal with them.
I work full time and take him back and forth for treatments daily which is 45 minutes each way and the the 1/2 hour for the treatment. I come home and feel like I need to spend all my time doing things that he needs.
I am learning to go to my 12 step program meetings, I need them right now.
Anyone have a suggestion?
Pat