I'm not a good patient either, when it was determined that I had, indeed, had a stroke [about 8 hrs. after it started] I refused to go the hospital - "just give me some medicine and let me go home". That was a stupid and hardheaded reaction. But during the ensueing rehabilitation of adjusting to the loss of sight in one eye and the loss of lots of brain power, my husband was a consumate caregiver [especially during the times I insisted he leave me alone!] Even after I regained some control over my brain and adjusted to life with one eye, he continued to do many of the things that I could have done[yep-he spoiled me rotten]. Caregiving isn't defined by gender- in my experience it is defined by strenght, determination and love. Amy in the Ozarks