Hi Jennie, Part of your question is, I think, about you. Even though you don't have the cancer, you are stuck with some of the life altering realities. Take some time for yourself to reflect and heal from the emotional trauma that you have been through too.

The happy news is that you should expect him to be back to his old self soon enough. Likely he has doubts about his appearance, that may be part of his attitude. Besides that the mind is the main sex organ and his mind has been distracted with some pretty big issues. Give it time and don't feel bad about being selfish.

Mark, 21 Year survivor, SCC right tonsil, 3 nodes positive, one with extra-capsular spread. I never asked what stage (would have scared me anyway) Right side tonsillectomy, radical neck dissection right side, maximum radiation to both sides, no chemo, no PEG, age 40 when diagnosed.