Amy,
I would get to a psychologist and psychiatrist as soon as possible!
In AA they have a saying "half measures avail us nothing". Most of us here have been willing "to go to any lengths" (another AA saying) to have the best possible outcome in a disease that doesn't exactly have the best survival rate.
I think Bob stated it very well. But even after going to "any lengths", I did my estate planning, living trust and filled out my "Advance Health Care Directive".


Gary Allsebrook
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Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2
Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy)
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"You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)