I'm afraid I have to take a minute to mourn the loss of a piece of the life we used to lead.

We saw the RO yesterday and initially he thought that's a possibility that an esophagus dilation might help. (John has extensive scarring from the radiation in his neck and I would think the problem he is now facing may be due to scarring or fibrosis.) But the surgical oncologist didn't think he wanted to do the dilation as in his opinion, it is a procedure that's only temporary and, hence, not a real solution. We now have a referral to a gastroenterologist and it is up to him to decide what can be done.

Today John and I had a discussion about the possibility of his being tube-dependent for the rest of his life. He said he didn't want to whine, I said he was entitled to mourn the loss of the enjoyment of food. We have decided that we will have to educate our friends with regards to how socialising with us can no longer be food-centred. John's cancer was vicious -- there were no clear margins and it was the kind that grew downwards and inwards -- that's why the doctors threw the heavy artillery at him. It was information I kept to myself all through his treatment (he was too overwhelmed to have heard and understood at the time) and only told him today. But it really helped him understand why he was given so much radiation.

Having said all that, we are still not giving up. We will go see the gastroenterologist and take it from there. But it is good to have that clear understanding between us.

I would also like to know if anyone on this forum has had multiple esophageal dilations that have stayed effective after a protracted period of time. It is okay to pm me if that is what you prefer.